Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • God: “You can’t just say ‘Goddammit!’ and expect Me to damn it. There’s a procedure. File the paperwork.”
  • If oats can be milk, you can be whatever you want.
  • Hiring a mortician to do my makeup while I sleep.
  • Laziness is the art to rest before one gets tired.
  • Can you imagine how hot I’d be if I ate right and took care of my body? I’m not gonna do it, but can you imagine?
  • I’m sorry, but I already have an A.I. boyfriend.