50+ Funny Multitasking Jokes That Make Doing Everything Hilarious

New funny multitasking jokes

• A good audiobook will have you inventing chores to do.

• I want time to watch more films, but I also want time to read more books, but I also want time to look at more nothing.

• I’m of the very strong opinion that sex ed should be taught by a woman 37 weeks into her third pregnancy, while her husband sits scrolling through his phone, and her other two children run wild.

• Making dinner with my left hand, so it feels like someone else is doing it.

• Twitter hits different, cause it’s like the only social media app you can use effectively while playing music.

• My therapist should also do my nails while we’re talking.

• Sure, sex is great, but have you ever closed a dozen tabs after finishing an academic paper?

• Not to brag, but I drove and found a place I was looking for without turning down my music today.

• Juggling screen time is the ultimate multitasking Olympics.

• I need a Netflix show called: “Background noise while you scroll on your phone.”

Top funny multitasking jokes

• Free marriage tip: Don’t ask your wife when dinner will be ready while she is mowing the lawn.

• My hobbies include using the TV as background noise while I scroll on my phone.

• For my next trick, I’ll watch a two-hour movie in four.

• The feminine urge to open a coffee shop that’s also a library, a bakery, and a flower shop.

• Frankly, I have too many situations and not enough monitors.

• Nobody is more stressed than a person who has a lot of interests or passions and is still confused about their career.

• I’ll rewind a movie, get on my phone, and miss the same part.

• Shoutout to everyone who can’t keep up with the laundry or the dishes but decided it was a great idea to start gardening.

• My laptop is overheating because I am doing a really good job.

• Sorry I zoned out during your story… my brain was offering me multiple side quests and overthinking opportunities.

Popular funny multitasking jokes

• At the job interview with one AirPod in.

• Ugh, those red and blue flashing lights are interfering with my driving and scrolling.

• Does anyone else feel like their brain has a hundred tabs open at once?

• People with ADHD be like “I can’t fry an egg, I got too much going on”.

• My idea of fun is watching something on the TV while I look at relevant Wikipedia articles on my phone.

• I’m at an age where, when I’m tying my shoes, I think about what else I can do while I’m down here.

• Crying at my desk while also finding time to cry in the shower makes for a healthy work-life balance.

• Sleep when the baby sleeps, eat when the baby eats, work when the baby works.

• Some people can start a task and then just finish it instead of trying to do a hundred things at once, like a squirrel on crack.

• What did parents do before smart phones, hold their babies with two hands or something?

More funny multitasking jokes

• I just turned on my car’s seat warmer to keep my burrito warm in case you wondered what I was up to.

• Men: Masters of multitasking – can watch sports, ignore laundry, and forget your birthday, all at once.

• Subtitles are for when you’re eating chips.

• My hair dryer is so powerful that it doubles as my leaf blower.

• I don’t always carry all the groceries on one arm, but when I do, my keys are in the wrong pocket.

• Of course the laundry has to be done, but the wine doesn’t drink itself either.

• Sometimes I rock it as a parent, other times I drop my phone on my sleeping child while taking a picture of it. It’s called balance.

• My brain has too many tabs open and one of them is playing music I can’t find.

• The ideal man is always thinking of several cool things at once (throwing a football really far, a truck with big wheels, giving a lot of high fives).

• Sometimes I wish I was an octopus, so I could slap eight people at once.

Witty multitasking jokes

• I’m multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time.

• I’m a multi-tasking procrastinator. I can put off multiple things at once.

• Car naps hit different, especially when you are the one driving.

• My mind is like my web browser. 19 tabs are open, 3 are frozen and I have no idea where the music is coming from.

• My brain has too many tabs open.

• Anyone else brush their teeth in the shower so they can get a little sloppy with it, or is that just me?

• Good morning, did you have a nice weekend? I ask my many open work tabs.

• Washing your face is actually multitasking because you are also washing your hands and forearms and shirt and countertop and feet and floor and hair.

• Sorry for how I acted when there were multiple noises happening at the same time.

• I’m sorry for the things I said when there were too many noises at the same time.