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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇴 has bookmarked:

So cool that avocados come with those little wooden balls inside, I think I have collected the whole set.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

Fun prank: make people study for many years, and then don’t give them jobs.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

Shark tooth necklaces are the perfect accessory if you want to look tough but also tell the world, “I’ve been to a gift shop.”

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

I didn’t ghost you, I saved you from me.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has copied:

If you’re wondering how motherhood is going, I’m watching a TV show and someone is in traction with a full body cast and I sighed and said “That looks so relaxing”

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

At this point, I’m not sure if my house is a mess or my mess is a house.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

At the job interview with one AirPod in.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

Hi. I didn’t mean to “like” your tweet. I was scraping dried jelly off my phone.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

Losing weight in your 40’s: LOL!

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

At my funeral, sit me up so I can see who’s talking to my man.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2269 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,431

Funny Quotes Topics

15,132

Funny Quotes Images

12,431

31 minutes ago

3,437

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on TikTok:

Telling my guitar to “stay tuned”.

Making waves on Slack:

My heart says, chocolate and wine, but my jeans say “Woman, are you kidding? Eat a salad!”

Making waves on Reddit:

How is every author the #1 New York Times bestseller?

Going viral on Facebook:

When people say something is cray-cray it makes me wanna vom-vom.

Live now on Twitch:

Asked my therapist who their therapist was and went to see them. Asked them the same thing until I got to the final boss therapist and defeated them with my train wreck of a life.

Just shared via TikTok:

I miss the days when our biggest argument was whether West Coast or East Coast rap was better.

Trending via Instagram:

Who called it a shopaholic and not a boughtanist?

Going viral on Slack:

All my small talk is done with a car horn.

Trending via LinkedIn:

I just found out it takes 5 sheep to make one wool sweater. I didn’t even know they knew how to knit.

Just shared via WeChat:

I get it, laundry, no one is doing me either.

A dating app for people who suck at flirting called Fumble.

6 months ago

A dating app for people who suck at flirting called Fumble.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Introducing the newest way to find love for the socially awkward – 𝗙𝘂𝗺𝗯𝗹𝗲! Because stumbling over your words has never been so charming 😉💘 Who needs smooth lines when you can have adorable bumbles? Swipe right for awkward charm! #FumbleDating #FlirtingFailures

app, dating, flirting, Fumble, humor, people, relationship, singles, social, suck

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2269 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,431

Funny Quotes Topics

15,132

Funny Quotes Images

12,431

31 minutes ago

3,446

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇼 has copied:

Me: This show is really boring. Boss: Again, this a zoom conference.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

I don’t have any rizz but I do have snacks in my purse.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

Beautiful women named Severe Thunderstorm Warning are blowing up my phone.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

“You look tired.” Yes, bro, I stayed up all night obsessing over things I have no control over.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

Not to brag but I don’t even need alcohol to make really bad decisions.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

Almonds are a scam. They are wood. You are eating wood.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

Valentine’s Day is a stupid and made up holiday unless someone wants to give me a present in which case I really believe in celebrating it.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

The older I get, the more I understand why roosters just scream to start their day.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has downloaded:

How did they get kids to pose for oil paintings? Mine won’t sit still for 4 seconds for a family photo.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

Breakups are hard, but have you ever been disappointed in the food you ordered?

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Your brain automatically translates WTF but not LOL.

Just shared via Threads:

I think it’s time when we buy new clothes that we have the option to buy the body they’re being modelled in too.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I like to live life dangerously by occasionally sticking my foot out over the edge of the bed at night.

Just landed via Slack:

The first time you forgive out of love. The second time out of hope and the third time out of stupidity.

Going viral on Twitch:

Grammar is the difference between knowing your shit and knowing you’re shit.

Trending via Discord:

I want to sleep but my brain won’t stop talking to itself.

Live now on Facebook:

This weekend was so busy, I hardly had time to sit around in my pajamas and doom scroll.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

69% of people find something dirty in every sentence.

Live now on Threads:

Imagine falling in love and then finding out that they put antlers on their car for the holidays.

Seen just now on Telegram:

People are like lottery tickets, most of them are losers.

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