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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

Washing mushrooms is the quickest way to figure out exactly how much dirt you’re okay with eating.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has viewed:

For as long as that song was, you’d think the Ghost Busters would have mentioned their phone number at least once.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

I’m at the gym and I just saw someone put their water bottle in the Pringles holder on the treadmill.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

It’s completely absurd that Silicon Valley is pushing AI on us before they figured out how to keep fries fresh for longer.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

My body is in shock this morning from having to wake up early and wear hard pants.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

Are you ever in the mood to get hit by a car and spend like one month in the hospital?

Someone from 🇿🇲 has viewed:

Keep your friend’s toast and your enemy’s toaster.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

Biblical loophole: It’s not premarital sex if you never intend to get married.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has downloaded:

I would love to be normal, but unfortunately, I was raised by the internet and a microwave.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has shared:

Everytime I spend $20 I think this is fine because I won’t do it again. And then would you believe.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

784 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,946

Funny Quotes Topics

13,917

Funny Quotes Images

10,946

56 minutes ago

3,430

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Twitch:

The worst thing about having children is the parents of the other children.

Seen just now on Discord:

American Feng Shui is when the grill doesn’t wobble.

Reported on Messenger:

What I’ve learned in all these years of marriage is how to open a bottle of beer silently.

Just shared via Threads:

The train announcer just said we should keep our personal belongings with us at all times but I’ve left most of mine at home.

Making waves on TikTok:

Nothing more dangerous than an ignorant man who thinks he is a genius.

Just shared via Twitch:

Siblings are proof you can love someone and also dislike them at the same time.

Going viral on Instagram:

“Don’t take this the wrong way!” Translation: Prepare for insult.

Breaking via Pinterest:

Being bilingual means stuttering in both languages.

Spotted on WeChat:

If I ever go missing, check the snack aisle. I’m probably just deciding.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I hate managing money, I was born to splurge.

Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain, and most do.

4 months ago

Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain, and most do.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, the art of criticism, a favorite pastime for the amateur philosophers and seasoned complainers alike! 🤔👏 From armchair critics to keyboard warriors, the realm of condemnation is a crowded one indeed! 😂 But hey, at least they're keeping the complaint department fully employed! 🙄💬 #CriticsGonnaCrit"

complain, condemn, criticize, fool, humor, irony, self-awarenes

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

784 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,946

Funny Quotes Topics

13,917

Funny Quotes Images

10,946

56 minutes ago

3,425

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇿 has downloaded:

Me watching any modern ad: How is this ad an ad for the thing it’s an ad for?

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

Watermelon. The fruit that comes with a workout.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

If you’re riding a bike in New York City, it means you care about your health. Riding one in Tennessee means you got a DUI.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

If they can bring back the dire wolf, they can bring back Norm Macdonald.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

Stomach: I will now demonstrate a blue whale’s mating call.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

Forget the alarm clock. Just give me the smell of bacon and coffee.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

Have you fallen in love with me yet, or do I need to post more nonsense?

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

Being complimented by a girl in public is like getting kissed by an angel.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

I’ve found God. It’s my turn to hide now.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

I hate when I offer someone food and they accept it.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Did you know that if you listen to any Black Sabbath album backwards, you can hear them singing backwards?

Just shared via Facebook:

The class: “You want us to do what?” Super Mario: “Jump around, catch and eat the giant mushroom, bang your head against the crates and, if necessary, crush all the critters. It’sa easy!”

Making waves on Twitch:

Whoever came up with a 30 minute lunch break needs a 30 minute beating.

Trending via Snapchat:

Yesterday, I went to the grocery store, and I managed to come home without any junk food. Now, I’m mad that we don’t have any junk food.

Shared recently on WeChat:

So apparently they don’t count as sit-ups if you’re just trying to get out of bed.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Adulthood will turn Gmail into part of your social media routine.

Spotted on Discord:

Aliens probably have group chats called Don’t Stop on Earth.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I already want to take a nap tomorrow.

Just shared via Telegram:

Hey, sorry I cant make it tonight. I am beset on all sides by foes.

Trending via Pinterest:

A big part of my job as a parent is moving things away from the edges of countertops.

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