Are they honking at me because I’m cute or because I can’t drive.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

The woman that cleaned my house could make a lot of money by threatening to release the before and after photos.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has shared:

Perhaps an evening in the meditation cage will soothe you.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

Managers want a week of silence and meditation in order to be even more of a manager afterwards.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

Every day I ask ChatGPT if it knows where my keys are and if it ever knows the answer, I’m suing everybody.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

If you’re going to text your boss that you’re an hour late, make sure you end with, “I’m bringing you a ham and cheese croissant.”

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

It whistles, doesn’t it? Your head when it’s windy.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has bookmarked:

When a lady compliments your facial hair, have the goddamn decency to compliment hers.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

You don’t scare me, you’re not my kid noticing her sibling got a bigger slice of cake.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

Twitter is like a psych ward with no staff.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

I may look fine on the outside, but on the inside I’m hungry again.