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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

I want a man who doesn’t annoy me while I’m constantly getting on his nerves. It can’t be that difficult.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

Whenever I get up my cat gets up too and then yells at me like it’s my fault she decided we have to do this together.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

The new American dream is an alien invasion.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

I smoke weed for my mental health and your personal safety.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

I hope Instagram is still active during the apocalypse, so the zombies can post pics of whose brains they’re currently eating.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

No one shoots at your feet and tells you to dance anymore.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

People who take naps are the real heroes. It takes courage to wake up twice in one day.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has bookmarked:

That was a nice hour long Twitter scroll. Feel much worse as always. See you guys tomorrow.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

The most I’ve ever spent on a bottle of wine is about 45 minutes.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

814 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,976

Funny Quotes Topics

13,917

Funny Quotes Images

10,976

Updated

43 minutes ago

Users Online

3,419

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WeChat:

Me driving at night: I hope this is the road!

Just shared via Reddit:

Save tons of money on a weighted blanket by sleeping under the mattress.

Spotted on Pinterest:

I was actually about to do a workout when the couch threw itself protectively under me.

Broadcasted on Slack:

I would like to thank my middle finger for always sticking up for me when I needed it.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

I wish I loved exercising as much as I love not exercising.

Seen just now on Slack:

Some people are storms dressed like sunsets. Beautiful from a distance. Dangerous up close.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Tried to sleep by reading a boring book and now it’s suddenly the most interesting book.

Trending via Snapchat:

I am just a man, a man who told a woman to calm down, so I guess this is goodbye.

Freshly posted on Threads:

And now begins the yearly tradition of writing the incorrect year on everything, for the next 3 months.

Just shared via Twitch:

That awkward moment your mom is doing the dishes and you slowly put your dish in the sink.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm sleep social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

814 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,976

Funny Quotes Topics

13,917

Funny Quotes Images

10,976

Updated

43 minutes ago

Users Online

3,423

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

Do you scroll through Netflix to find a good show for your dog to watch when you leave the house or are you normal?

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

The closer you are to nature, the further you are from idiots.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

If you give a man a fish, that fish is basically gone. Way to lose your fish.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

Double chins are better than double faces.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

Autocorrect changed ‘are you around?’ to ‘are you aroused?’ and my buddy didn’t want to hang out today.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has copied:

I am never hungrier than when I leave the dentist and told I can’t eat right away.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

Welcome to your 40s—you run out of breath trying to find your running shoes.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

Doesn’t matter if the chicken or the egg came first. Still a weird thing to just appear.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has downloaded:

Sometimes my mouth hits send before my brain has a chance to stop it.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

Toddlers are like puppies, they don’t care if they’re dirty and smelly and they both have an affinity exploring the trash bin.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Twitch:

Harry Potter is sort of crazy. I would have never fought a war for my high school.

Reported on TikTok:

Please don’t ask me about my dream job. I would never work in my dreams.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Holding it together with duct tape and sarcasm.

Trending via Snapchat:

Always keep a dog eared book on your nightstand so that people think you know how to read.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Teens be like, “This is the worst day of my life,” and it’s just that they were told to unload the dishwasher.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I hope you all get laid soon, for your own mental health.

Live now on Messenger:

At the strip club sighing until one of the dancers asks me what’s wrong.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Once you turn 25 years and above, there is no need to set an alarm. Your problems will wake you up by force.

Just shared via Messenger:

I hope Google never goes down. I know like six, maybe seven, things.

Making waves on X:

Every time you break spaghetti noodles in half, an Italian has a stroke.

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