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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

While you were rotting and wasting your life away, I was doing the exact same thing.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

Ah, the magical land of Monday—the gift that keeps not giving!

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

Of course I do cardio. It’s called running from my problems.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

December, give me a sweet ending for this year please.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has copied:

Driving a newer car is like “Oh weird, this one doesn’t have Shake on Highway, maybe they stopped making that feature”.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

I like to just appear out of nowhere and say, “this looks like a job for a binder clip.”

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

Welcome to your 40s. You’re home from the party before you used to go out for the party in your 20s.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

Taking a guy from skinny jeans to linen trousers, that’s my way of giving back to society.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has bookmarked:

I’m just a crazy person looking for a crazy person who finds me completely normal.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

Female rage is your handbag continuously slipping off your shoulder.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,570

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WhatsApp:

People remind me everyday why I prefer being on my own.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

My passport probably thinks I’m in prison.

Just landed via Slack:

All our dogs think we quit our jobs to spend more time with them. All our cats think we got fired for being lazy.

Going viral on Threads:

I’m so single, even my husband won’t match with me on Tinder.

Live now on WhatsApp:

A college education is one of the few things a person is willing to pay for and not get.

Just shared via YouTube:

I don’t want to be dramatic, but the work week continuously restarting is literally ruining my life.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

My superpower is to wake up more tired than I was when I fell asleep.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Stop telling everyone I’m posting from earth. People don’t need to know where I live.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

My wife is pretty excited about going away this weekend so I’m not sure she knows I’m coming with her.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Don’t go chasing waterfalls? The place where many video games hide easter eggs and other rare items?

Funny circumstances quotes

Funny circumstances quotes bring a burst of laughter when life throws unexpected twists 😆🎢 Whether you’re caught in an awkward moment or a hilarious mishap, these witty gems turn chaos into comedy 🤪✨ Ready to smile through the madness? Let’s dive into the funniest takes on those unforgettable, laugh-out-loud situations that make life anything but boring! 😂🔥

New funny circumstances quotes 👇

All funny circumstances quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

90 shares on Pinterest this month:

Nobody is busier than a woman who isn’t into you.

35 shares on Twitch this month:

Feeling melancholy. Think I’ll have a drink and make things much worse.

22 shares on Telegram this month:

Moving is legitimately one of the worst human experiences.

20 shares on Twitch this month:

My retirement plan is 100% contingent on me finding a buried treasure at some point.

80 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m a little too self-aware to enjoy life, and a little too delusional to give up.

53 shares on Messenger this month:

Sundays are no place for pants or responsibility.

93 shares on X this month:

If you don’t have a favorite spatula yet, you still have some growing up to do.

43 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Always stay crazy. Otherwise you’ll go crazy.

42 shares on Pinterest this month:

I skip questions on exams like I’m gonna be a different person when I come back to them.

14 shares on Threads this month:

Some things are better left unsaid, which I usually realize after I say them.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t understand, “kill them with kindness”; can I use a lightsaber instead?

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Girlfriend is temporary, ex-girlfriend is forever.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Ever since I was young, I wanted to check my email for a verification code.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Liquor on the top shelf is so expensive because the bartender has to stand on their tippy toes to reach it.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

We used to pass notes in class like spies. Folded like origami. Deep like Shakespeare.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Deleting the paragraph you wrote and texting back “ok” is a different type of self-control.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I like how “energy bars” are really just candy bars, and we all pretend to not notice.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t give up on your dreams. If cauliflower can be pizza and zucchini can be noodles, you too can be anything you want.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not here to offend anyone; I’m here to offend everyone.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Why does it take 5-7 days to refund me when it took 5-7 seconds to take it out?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,466

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

Nice tweets, bro. What medications are you on?

Someone from 🇨🇳 has shared:

I love how all the movies about teenagers have to be set in the 90s or earlier otherwise we’d just be watching kids on their phones for two hours.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

Take me down to the Moria city, where the girls are green and the boys are stinky… and even Gandalf said ‘Nope, too freaky!’

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

Dating me is super easy. I text you at 8; you reply at 8:00:01.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

The world would be a better place if mosquitoes sucked fat instead of blood.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

Next time I feel incompetent at my job, I hope I remember that someone once pushed a live software update that crashed half the planet.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has downloaded:

Onion rings? I’m answering.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has downloaded:

The Scream movies were believable in the ’90s, but no one with any common sense answers unknown numbers on their phones anymore.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

Long distance relationships can work if the four of you all truly trust each other.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Pinterest:

Pro Tip: Never make snow angels in a dog park.

Shared recently on Discord:

Everyone’s a gangster until they see a rainbow.

Just shared via Reddit:

I hope this email makes you quit your job.

Live now on Twitch:

Some people pack their lives so full of activities, appointments and people that I get exhausted just reading about it.

Live now on X:

I used to be able to eat whatever I wanted without gaining weight. Now I pick up a fork and gain seven pounds.

Going bananas on Messenger:

Took a good look at my finances. I won’t make that mistake again.

Shared recently on Telegram:

I woke up extra early today to get in as much ‘worrying about it being Monday tomorrow’ as possible.

Just shared via Pinterest:

You want fast replies from a female? Argue with her!

Just landed via Pinterest:

Going on dates is hard because do I like them or do I just have sooo much fun being me.

Going viral on Facebook:

You don’t scare me, I was married once.

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