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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

I’m basically a taxi today for the kids and dogs.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has downloaded:

I must retire to my chambers about this.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

As someone with OCD, I can’t help but respect how Pringles are just like, no, this is the order you must eat them in.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

It’s a myth that we only use 10% of our brain, but I definitely know people who use less than that.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

Sorry, I can’t come. I’m still recovering from the last time I went out.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

When I worked as a restaurant critic, I wrote under a nom nom nom de plume.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

One of the great things about being a dad is how easy it is to launder my own desire for ice cream through my children.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

Blocking someone isn’t enough, I want them to get lice.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

I love sleeping. You don’t spend any money and you don’t miss anyone.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

There are a 100 billions nerves in the human body, and there are people who have the ability to irritate all of them.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,547

Funny Quotes Topics

16,780

Funny Quotes Images

14,547

Nov 27, 2025

3,704

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on X:

Microdosing bungee jumping by bending over to pick up a hair tie.

Just shared via Slack:

When I was a kid, I had to walk to Netflix.

Trending via Messenger:

As someone who was born in August, I find the word leotard extremely offensive.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I’m a fully functional adult with the energy levels of a hibernating bear.

Seen just now on Telegram:

My kids didn’t follow me into the bathroom so now I’m scared to leave and find out what they got into instead.

Just landed via Facebook:

I start off my mornings with coffee and low expectations.

Just landed via TikTok:

Of course babies cry when flying, their entire understanding of planes centers around them being eaten.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I’m either freezing, peeing, or starving.

Live now on YouTube:

With a cat on your lap, you deal better with the crap.

Breaking via Threads:

You have one week to ask me to be your Valentine. Requests must be in the form of poetic verse written in your blood.

Home » Funny Civil War Quotes

Funny civil war quotes

New funny civil war quotes 👇

3 weeks ago

Commentary:
"Looks like avoiding a civil war comes down to practicality, not just fighting spirit! 💼💰 Who has time for battle when there's bills to pay and deadlines to meet? 😂 Let's settle our differences over coffee breaks instead, shall we? ☕️ #OfficeLifeWars"

afford, civil, civil war, economy, humor, much, priorities, take, time, time off, war, work

All funny civil war quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,547

Funny Quotes Topics

16,780

Funny Quotes Images

14,547

Nov 27, 2025

3,568

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

I am convinced that some of you are failed experiments that gained sentience and escaped from a lab.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

I’m not even a 2nd choice, I’m like an 8th choice, sometimes a 10th.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

French fries are like the lifeboats on the Titanic. They never give you enough.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

Sometimes I wish I was an octopus, so I could slap eight people at once.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

Not gonna lie, toddlers absolutely nailed it with naps, buttered noodles, and rejecting authority.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

This meeting could have been a cave painting.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

Men love to show you a YouTube video. It is a sign of deep respect in their culture.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

Camping? No, thank you. If I wanted to sleep outside, I wouldn’t pay my mortgage.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

“I’m not afraid to admit when I’m wrong. For example, I thought it was a good idea to leave the house today, which, as it turns out, was a terrible mistake.”

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

Ever feel like you’re adulting, but only on the outside? Inside, you’re just a kid hoping someone else will make dinner.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on TikTok:

The first bowl of cereal makes you want a second, but the second makes you wish you stopped at the first.

Spotted on Instagram:

Nobody is more cold-blooded than a toddler, just saying what they see and feel.

Trending via WeChat:

(to the boys in the yard) I hope you brought your own milkshake.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Most guys probably just have a foot fetish because their first girlfriend was a sock.

Shared recently on Facebook:

No plans and no pants kind of day.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Being the forward-thinking person I am, I kept my winter fat through the summer.

Going viral on Facebook:

I’m at the “buy bigger jeans” part of my Eat. Pray. Love. journey.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

You have to be careful about sending your spouse things on social media. You send too many things, next thing you know chores are being redistributed because of “all the free time you clearly have”.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Life is so draining, you fix one problem, here come 12 more.

Shared recently on Slack:

Welcome to middle age. You now take pictures of instructions so you can enlarge them.

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