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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

I’ve decided to cut my carbs… into smaller pieces before eating them.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

Back in my day there was so much toilet paper and so much eggs that we gathered at night and threw them at the houses of our enemies.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

Not to brag, but I skipped my mid-life crisis and went straight to cranky old man.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has viewed:

Laundry day is my favorite day of the week. That’s why I dress for it every day.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

One day I’ll do amazing things. Today I’ll be satisfied if I don’t spill food on my lap.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

Maybe there’s an alternate universe where onions cry when they chop up humans, you don’t know.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

How are they running out of oxygen if they’re breathing it right back into the submarine?

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

I don’t care about life on other planets. I don’t even have a life on this one.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

My workout goals are simple: I’d just like to be able to get up off the floor without looking like a turtle trying to flip itself back over.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

There is no bigger day for microwaves than the 26th day of December. This is their Olympics.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

810 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,972

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,972

18 minutes ago

3,430

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Snapchat:

I bought a bag of M&M’s and they don’t have M’s anymore. They all have W’s, for woke.

Live now on Snapchat:

I am cutting contact with my 3-year-old narcissist nephew.

Going viral on TikTok:

Ever look at someone and think you could spend the rest of your life saying “What?” to this person?

Broadcasted on Discord:

Nothing tests your patience like a group chat blowing up your phone.

Going viral on Twitch:

I’m sorry I don’t take orders. I barely take suggestions.

Trending via Reddit:

Hey girl, are you an extraterrestrial? ’Cause your husband’s out here acting like you don’t exist.

Spotted on X:

Your odds are greater of being killed by a coconut rather than a shark and this is exactly why I don’t swim in coconut-infested waters.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

One day you’re 18 eating pizza for every lunch, then suddenly you’re 30 and eating salad with celery and kale juice.

Spotted on Threads:

One thing about me is I don’t even need to get drunk to act a fool.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I’m already spoiled… please don’t come into my life trying to unspoil me.

Home » Funny Coaching Quotes

Funny coaching quotes

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6 months ago
Share →: My life coach traded me.

Commentary:
Looks like your life coach upgraded to a higher maintenance client! 🔄💁‍♂️ Time to find a new coach who won't trade you in for the latest model. #LifeCoachProblems 😄🏃‍♂️

For even more funny coaching quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny coaching quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

810 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,972

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,972

18 minutes ago

3,425

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

I will not hesitate to use dark magic on you.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has viewed:

“You like talking to yourself?” God forbid I seek advice from an expert.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

“Topless” doesn’t always mean breasts or a convertible. Sometimes it also means the brain.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has copied:

How long does it take for an apple to turn brown after you cut it? Never mind.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

The Internet is fun because you can post about banana bread and somehow end up in a fight.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

I’m as single as a one Dollar bill, and I don’t need any change.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

I have more photos of food on my phone than I do of my children.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

I need to consult the woods about this.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

Spending money is too easy. For my bank account’s sake, I need a bridge troll to ask me three riddles before I’m allowed to buy something.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

She’s a 10, but she says ‘Orwellian’ when it’s clearly ‘Kafkaesque”.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

I’ve done literally nothing all day, except feel guilty about doing nothing all day.

Just shared via Slack:

My bank account may not be full but my sink, laundry basket and arteries sure are.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Who called it asking the waiter about the specials and not retrieving data from the server?

Freshly posted on Threads:

It’s called the Summer Olympics so one of the events should be running in flip flops to catch the ice cream man.

Live now on Snapchat:

Some days you feel like you’re surrounded by idiots, other days you realize it’s not just some days.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Blocking him isn’t enough. I want his favorite sports team to finish last every year for now and forever.

Spotted on Discord:

Arguing through text will have you standing in one spot for 40 mins.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I have never seen a single “when animals attack” video that I wasn’t rooting for the animal.

Trending via WhatsApp:

As I’m cleaning my room, this is a friendly reminder that you actually don’t need that free t-shirt or tote bag from that event.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

My favorite body lotion is Voltaren.

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