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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

Someday I will make a sandwich that will change my life forever.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

I’m so glad I cleaned the house so the kids have a clean canvas to drop their stuff everywhere.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

I just came across my wife’s Tinder profile and I’m so angry about her lies. She is not “fun to be around”.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has downloaded:

The rainforest cafe won’t be authentic enough for me if they don’t bulldoze 40% of the restaurant while I’m there.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

Taylor Swift should write a song about people who don’t return their shopping carts to the corrals.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

Maybe women decided to convince men that beards were sexy because they were sick of cleaning the washbasin after he shaved.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

The first person to ever throw up was probably like, “Ok, what the hell.”

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

How I flirt? I look at an attractive person several times and hope that they are bolder than me.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

Never in the history of calming down has anyone calmed down after being told to calm down.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

At this point making life choices involves liquor and a dart board.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

790 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,952

Funny Quotes Topics

13,923

Funny Quotes Images

10,952

Updated

56 minutes ago

Users Online

3,443

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on TikTok:

When I take a walk, I bring dog treats and people treats. I almost never mix them up.

Making waves on Messenger:

I don’t have any rizz but I do have snacks in my purse.

Making waves on WeChat:

Cicadas are all like, “Y’all mind if I scream?”

Reported on X:

I’ve left my past behind me, so if I owe you money, sorry, I’ve left it behind me.

Going viral on Slack:

Life is just a sequence of missed opportunities.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

My nutritionist told me wine doesn’t count as a fruit source so now I need to find a different nutritionist.

Trending via Reddit:

I don’t even want to talk about the things I had to do to that elf to get back on the nice list.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

I would love to go back to the days when the biggest stress was finding the best hiding place when playing hide and seek.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

An apple a day may keep the doctor away, but some silly a day keeps the boredom at bay.

Going viral on Pinterest:

We all have that one coworker whose sole purpose is to reduce our life expectancy by ten years.

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Funny down to earth quotes

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All funny down to earth quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

790 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,952

Funny Quotes Topics

13,923

Funny Quotes Images

10,952

Updated

56 minutes ago

Users Online

3,445

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

Of all the things to lose why couldn’t it have been my appetite and not my mind.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

Brain, I know you’re trying hard, but you are not doing a good job.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

If Pokémon were real, state fairs would serve them deep fried on a stick.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has copied:

I have my own hand stamper at home so my coworkers will think I went someplace fun the night before.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

Imagine hating me and im just at my desk spinning reeaaally fast in my office chair.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

Imagine how much better the world would be if everyone set aside their differences and came together as one to buy me a castle.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

I hate when I grab a live wire and everyone sees my damn skeleton.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

Everyone has that one friend they’ve known for years and still have no idea what they actually do for a living, but it’s too late to ask.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

Did anyone ask the daylight if it wanted to be saved?

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

The pigeons are plotting to overthrow the government. It will start with a coo.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on TikTok:

“You smell so good!” Okay, so kiss me.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

I’m too tired to shower. Anyone want to wash my back?

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Every day I ask ChatGPT if it knows where my keys are and if it ever knows the answer, I’m suing everybody.

Trending via Instagram:

I’m super lazy today. It’s like normal lazy but I’m wearing a cape.

Just shared via TikTok:

Being a serial killer is much like being a comedian, in that you either hit it big and get your own Netflix special, or you spend eternity popping up on shitty podcasts.

Just landed via Twitch:

Dating now is basically choosing which red flag you’re willing to tolerate.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I left the house with wet hair and no makeup on, so I’m sure I’ll run into everyone I know.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

And then I thought to myself, “What’s the point of cleaning if my family is going to keep living here?”

Making waves on Telegram:

A Jackie Chan fight scene where he’s in an IKEA warehouse and he fights off dudes with furniture pieces, but by the end he’s accidentally assembled it all into a complete Malm bedroom set.

Seen just now on Slack:

I wish I was a cat, because the fatter you are, the more people like you.

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