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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇶 has viewed:

But babe, that’s my emotional support Lord of the Rings Extended Edition.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

Dating apps aren’t working, time to start drinking beer and eating hot dogs along the first base line at a baseball game.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

Maybe hot chocolate wants to be called beautiful chocolate at least one time.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

It takes so much energy to go inside a Walmart.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

I really feel like we need to have more fun in life, because literally nothing matters.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

Women know the exact weight of their children and their age in days. Men just know that little people live with them.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

Maybe Rome was built in a day. I wasn’t there.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

You didn’t let me know you got home safely so you better at least be injured or I’m gonna be pissed.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

Another day of meaningless suffering. Let’s see what awaits us tomorrow.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

You seem really unhinged, we should grab coffee sometime.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,700

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Telegram:

Moose would have been a better name for a cow.

Seen just now on Reddit:

It’s awkward touching hands with another man inside a popcorn bag, especially if you don’t know the man and he doesn’t know you’re eating his popcorn.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Relationship status: We have changed from “I love you” to “I love YouTube”.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Nurse: “This may hurt.” Me: “My life hasn’t been much fun either.”

Shared recently on Slack:

Hate when anxiety gives me stomach problems. Like, baby, you are supposed to be a mental disorder, please stay in your line.

Making waves on YouTube:

If she says “you are my world” remember there are other planets. Stay alert, kings!

Shared recently on Slack:

I don’t understand people who don’t have kids. Imagine having absolutely nobody to blame when you’re late.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

Dating after 40 is like trying to find the least damaged item at the thrift store that doesn’t smell.

Going viral on Discord:

If you think my posts are ridiculous, you should see some of my life choices.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Just thinking how many animals we had to ride on before we realized horses were ok with it.

Funny family vacation quotes

Funny family vacation quotes capture the hilarious chaos of traveling with loved ones! 🏖️😂 From road trip antics to unforgettable moments in faraway places, these quotes highlight the fun, laughter, and sometimes crazy experiences that come with family getaways. Get ready to relive the best (and funniest) parts of your family adventures! 😄🚗

New funny family vacation quotes 👇

All funny family vacation quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

14 shares on Discord this month:

In your 20s, you will be tempted to prove that you’re doing well. It’s important you resist performing for an audience that isn’t watching.

75 shares on Discord this month:

Dating again after you break up with a long-term partner is like dying in a video game and ending up back at the start to do it all again, except with less health.

72 shares on X this month:

Please don’t take illegal substances. Or at least, don’t take MY illegal substances.

88 shares on Instagram this month:

Pomegranates are worth the mess.

23 shares on Messenger this month:

I have this rare skin disease called perfect.

53 shares on Pinterest this month:

If I’m too much, go find less. I’m not running a clearance sale.

21 shares on Threads this month:

Going to a wedding really reminds me of the important things in life. Like cake.

56 shares on YouTube this month:

Do you also sometimes turn on the TV just so you have background noise or am I weird?

38 shares on Twitch this month:

Home is where you can say anything because nobody’s really listening, anyway.

91 shares on WeChat this month:

Hug your children as often as you can. They can’t break things during this time.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I have a date and nothing to wear. Or as Nietzsche said: If you stare into a closet long enough, the closet stares back at you.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I can see the appeal of golf, the only sport where the winner is the one who does the least.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Fun prank: make people study for 16 years, and then don’t give them jobs.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

We are talking about how beautiful and cool you are behind your back.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Whenever my Mother-in-Law’s stories end with “And I turned out OK” I’m looking around like who’s gonna tell her.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I changed my password to ‘incorrect’ so whenever I forget it, the computer tells me it’s incorrect, and I’m like, ‘Wow, you didn’t have to be so rude about it.’

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Once your parents move from “What time are you coming back” to “Are you coming back today,” you have won the war.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Not to brag, but my children already knew everything I told them today.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

People don’t realize how hard you ride for them until you park.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Goodnight to the men who know one woman is enough. The rest can die.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,515

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

Uber drivers have secret access to a streaming service of exclusively the worst music you’ve ever heard.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

Sending your selfies to NASA because you’re a star.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

It’s always fun listening to someone’s lie when you already know the truth.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

Ain’t no girls in my messages, just a bunch of verification codes.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

I’m so good at missing early morning meetings, I can do it with my eyes closed.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has copied:

Some people stay in the past because that’s where they peaked.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but you don’t need a special occasion to buy a cake.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

The most incredible thing about James Bond is the way he can walk into any hotel room and immediately know how to use the shower.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

Booked an escape room but just to get away from everyone. No plans of escaping.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

Procrastination isn’t a horrible thing. I mean, you always have something to do tomorrow… plus you have nothing to do today.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Messenger:

Social media has given everyone a chance to be heard, and it was a gigantic mistake.

Just shared via Instagram:

No one talks about the horrific event of meeting someone who is exactly your type.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Handsome, you better get to the point, my beer buzz is starting to wear off.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

If we’ve got the technology to make heated car seats, then where the hell are the seats that automatically cool down in the summer? Make it happen, nerds.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

So many people to disappoint, so little time.

Just shared via Facebook:

If I was on Love Island, I would get wasted and drown in the pool, altering the course of every contestant’s life forever.

Trending via Discord:

If paying a cashier a living wage will make prices go up, why doesn’t replacing cashiers with self-checkouts make prices go down?

Trending via Telegram:

Millennials are so young because we were never allowed to grow up. Still living like broke college kids in our 40s.

Trending via WeChat:

Men become instantly more attractive when they wear aviators; it’s science.

Spotted on Messenger:

My Uber driver didn’t try to talk to me the entire ride. Five stars.

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