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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

I hate being in that mood where nothing’s really wrong but nothing feels right either.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

I have more trips planned than I have money.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has downloaded:

I need to know the brand of toothbrush my neighbor has. I hear it buzzing sometimes an hour at a time and she’s clearly enjoying it.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

I can’t stop thinking about how a tanning bed really turns you into the human version of a gas station hot dog.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

Best thing about TikTok is you literally don’t need to follow anyone to have a good time.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

I just heard someone refer to Texas as “Howdy Arabia” and I still haven’t stopped laughing.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

The evening news: Where they begin with “Good evening” and then proceed to tell you why it’s not.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

It takes so much energy to go inside a Walmart.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

The worst part about borrowing money is having to pay it back or move to a new city.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

I woke up deciding to incorporate the parkour lifestyle into my daily life then reconsidered as I fell over again putting my jeans on.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,344

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Instagram:

Difference between a flirt and harassment: if you are handsome, it’s a flirt, if you are ugly, it’s harassment.

Going viral on Threads:

I’m at the age where unnecessary noise be pissing me off.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Math is like Chinese to me.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Don’t wait until you’re on your death bed to let them know how you feel. You may be too weak to raise your middle finger.

Going viral on Threads:

“Beauty sleep” is bullshit. I sleep 14 hours a day and still look like trash.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Meeting Beyoncé and telling her I loved her in Goldmember and mentioning nothing about her music career, just to see if it throws her off.

Going bananas on Messenger:

I have no beef with vegetarians.

Spotted on Slack:

Don’t argue with her. Just say “you remind me of my ex” then walk away.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I got called “pretty” today! Well, the full sentence was “You’re pretty annoying,” but I only focus on the positive things.

Just shared via X:

Those eyes ain’t gonna roll itself, let me help you.

Funny funny comment quotes

Funny funny comment quotes are the ultimate mood lifters 😂🎉! Whether you’re scrolling through social media or chatting with friends, these witty gems add a splash of humor and lighten the vibe 🌟😜. Ready to boost your laugh game and share some chuckles? Dive into the world of clever quips and hilarious one-liners that keep the good times rolling! 🎈🤣

New funny funny comment quotes 👇

Wild how we don’t get a public holiday for Wrestlemania, but okay.

4 weeks ago

celebration, comment, event, funny comment, holiday, humor, okay, public, public holiday, sports, sports event, wild, Wrestlemania
You look like you can go as yourself for Halloween.

1 month ago

appearance, comment, costume, funny comment, Halloween, humor, joke, self, yourself
Is it smoky eye or were you wearing mascara and your eyes got itchy?

1 month ago

beauty, comment, eye, eyes, funny comment, humor, itchy, itchy eye, joke, makeup, mascara, smoky, smoky eye

All funny funny comment quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

49 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Yesterday I went to a fight and a baseball game broke out.

91 shares on Discord this month:

Therapy should be free and accessible because getting traumatized is free and accessible.

26 shares on YouTube this month:

People say, “Listen to your heart, do the right thing,” like they are the same things.

66 shares on Twitch this month:

I’d change my name to laundry if it meant you’d think about doing me every day.

93 shares on Messenger this month:

I’m not lazy, I’m on power saving mode.

92 shares on Pinterest this month:

“How am I supposed to avoid Al when I’ve procrastinated on a paper?” With a night full of caffeine and nicotine like your forefathers, you babies.

13 shares on Facebook this month:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here eating Nutella from the jar with a spoon.

41 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My Uber driver didn’t try to talk to me the entire ride. Five stars.

52 shares on X this month:

In the 90s, you’d always find your way to some stranger’s house.

93 shares on Twitch this month:

“It gets to a point” is one of my favourite phrases because it literally does get to a point sometimes.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Reverse cowgirl so I can bend backward and look at him like the Exorcist.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Accidentally manifested an emotionally intelligent man that is hot and can cook. We’re currently staring at each other.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

My morning routine includes 10 minutes of sitting on my bed and thinking about how tired I am.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

My favorite delusion is that I just need to get through this week.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

This post ain’t gonna like itself, damn.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Every time you rub your eyes, they should change color a little.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve never found a “Remember Me” checkbox that works. Nothing remembers me.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Whenever I lose my faith in justice, I look at the high school beauties from back then today. Then I’m fine again.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Do vape shops and nail salons actually make money, or is my town’s economy one big laundering scheme?

10 folks are currently checking 👀

“Do you like the Microsoft Teams app?” Does Sisyphus like his boulder?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,339

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

Some people are living bowel movement to bowel movement.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

My family asked me what I wanted for Mother’s Day, so I packed their bags and changed the locks.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

I used to be a night owl, but as I’ve gotten older, I’ve become more of a person who doesn’t function at any time.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

Not to brag, but I skipped my mid-life crisis and went straight to cranky old man.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

“Why don’t you tell us anything anymore?” I’ve updated my privacy policy.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

I just want peace, not a notification every time someone breathes.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

I can’t believe I used to think I was stressed in high school.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

Every gift guide for men is like “A flannel flask to hold your knife flavored whiskey.”

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

My rapper name would be 2 stressd.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has shared:

The problem with salad is, it’s salad.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Dear predictive text, I am tired of sending people “Thanksgiving” when they send me a recipe or directions.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

Sorry, can’t. Calling NASA and making alien noises.

Spotted on Threads:

I feel like Mario has more raw prowess, but Luigi is probably the more sensual lover.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Cinderella had one night out, and it changed her life. I had one night out, and it changed my credit score.

Shared recently on Instagram:

The lion does not concern himself with social proof.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Going out on Friday night will always be better than going out on a Saturday night.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Sorry for bouncing my leg. I’m not allowed to bash my head into the walls anymore.

Making waves on Snapchat:

At the airport, and a wife asked her husband, “Where are our seats?” and he responds, “In the airplane.”

Seen just now on Instagram:

My therapist said cutting people off isn’t healthy. She’s next.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

My signature move is waving at someone who is waving at the person behind me.

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