Funny Job Quotes That Will Have You Laughing Through Your 9 to 5! 💼😂

Every morning when that damn alarm clock goes off, I just feel it so much: A million-dollar inheritance suits me much better than an office job.

Oct 27, 20232 months ago

I did the math and a second job would help me get out of debt as long as I start it twelve years ago.

Oct 11, 2023Oct 11, 2023

“You don’t load the dishwasher right,” I said to my wife just before it permanently became my job.

Oct 7, 2023Oct 7, 2023

Relationships: Because sometimes destroying your life is a two person job.

Sep 25, 2023Sep 25, 2023

I am dressing for the job I want. I want to be a sweatpants model.

Sep 23, 2023Sep 25, 2023

Still don’t understand how girls with no jobs be holding iPhones.

Sep 22, 2023Oct 3, 2023

I hate commas. It’s not my job to tell you when you breathe. Work it out, you’re a grown adult.

Sep 22, 2023Oct 22, 2023

I didn’t know that Rome wasn’t built in a day. I wasn’t on that job.

Sep 22, 2023Sep 25, 2023

I want the job where I push scared skydivers out of planes.

Sep 22, 2023Oct 26, 2023

I need a reasonable job. Something like $3,000 an hour. Nothing too wild.

Sep 22, 2023Sep 25, 2023

Good morning everyone, who feels like working today? I promise I’ll let you do my job.

Sep 22, 2023Sep 25, 2023

My sweatpants sat me down and said they want me to get an office job again.

Sep 22, 2023Sep 25, 2023

When is a robot gonna take over my job? Please?

Sep 22, 2023Sep 30, 2023

If the interviewer doesn’t think it’s cool when you pull a quarter out of his ear, the job wasn’t good enough for you anyways.

Sep 22, 2023Sep 25, 2023

Don’t be ashamed of who you are, that is your parent’s job.

Sep 22, 2023Sep 25, 2023

It’s okay to love your job. Just know it doesn’t love you back.

Sep 22, 2023Sep 25, 2023

All our dogs think we quit our jobs to spend more time with them. All our cats think we got fired for being lazy.

Sep 22, 2023Oct 11, 2023

At my next job, I’m gonna lie about having a kid so I can leave the office anytime I want like everyone else with children.

Sep 22, 2023Sep 29, 2023

If lying was a job some people would be billionaires.

Sep 22, 2023May 6, 2024

In a job interview, you can always respond to an awkward question with a deep gaze and parted lips, followed by “You complete me.”

Sep 22, 2023Sep 25, 2023