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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

Red Bull doesn’t give me wings, it gives me gas.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

Restaurant toilets are dangerous! So many of my dates have gone to use them and vanished.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

Sorry I’m late. I was in the car waiting for my song to end.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

Nothing ruins an introvert’s day like a 4 p.m. appointment.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

I love how unforgiving soy sauce is. Cause you know immediately when you did too much with her.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

What is that job called where you put the little stickers on fruit? I think I would be good at that.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

Commas are like garlic, you measure with your heart.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

I’m capable of doing a lot of things but listening to people chew their food is not one of them.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

Tomorrow isn’t promised, we need to kiss today.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

The people who upload old movies to the internet are holding society together.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

237 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,506

Funny Quotes Topics

17,571

Funny Quotes Images

15,506

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,658

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Slack:

It’s exciting to receive a Valentine’s Day card and not know who it’s from. A Father’s Day card, not so much.

Just landed via Reddit:

I saw a bird get a worm today. It was about 11 am. So, don’t give up on your dreams, buddy!

Shared recently on X:

I’m bad at being sad. Three minutes in, and I’m already making fun of my situation.

Going viral on WeChat:

You should never donate to people that collect money for marathons. They just take your money and run.

Going bananas on YouTube:

The only downside to dating hot men is that when it ends, he’s still hot.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

One of the great things about being a dad is how easy it is to launder my own desire for ice cream through my children.

Trending via Messenger:

Memes are the most information-dense form of communication.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

If anyone wants to sponsor me, I’ll be running a 0.002K this weekend to raise awareness for laziness.

Spotted on Facebook:

In your 20s, there will be an evil narcissist demon disguised as the man of your dreams. It’s important that you run from that loser before he steals your light.

Breaking via WeChat:

I have lots of hidden talents. The problem is, even I can’t find them.

Funny lecture quotes

Funny lecture quotes 🎤💡 bring a splash of humor to those long, sometimes snooze-worthy classes! Whether you’re a student struggling to stay awake or a teacher looking to lighten the mood, these witty lines will have you chuckling 🤣 and nodding in agreement. Get ready to laugh, relate, and maybe even share a few gems with your friends 📚😂. Who said learning can’t be fun?

New funny lecture quotes 👇

All funny lecture quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

82 shares on Instagram this month:

Taking the day off to brush up on conspiracy theories and really get this family party started.

67 shares on WhatsApp this month:

When I was a kid, they played lame music for middle-aged people in the supermarket, but this morning at Whole Foods, it’s now all amazing bangers from my youth.

83 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I have never in my life learned from another person’s mistakes, I would literally let a giant wooden horse into my house right this second.

51 shares on Facebook this month:

I’m feeling sexy today. You’ve been warned.

99 shares on Messenger this month:

There should be bloopers at the end of horror films to relax the viewer before sleeping.

26 shares on Messenger this month:

The best part about NYC is you literally see a brand new, hottest woman in your entire life every single day.

11 shares on Messenger this month:

Having a daughter is like having a little broke best friend who thinks you’re rich.

90 shares on YouTube this month:

It got weird when I thought both arm rests at the movie theatre were mine.

48 shares on Slack this month:

Welcome to your 40s: you get tired from sleeping now.

78 shares on Pinterest this month:

If someone asks you: ‘Why are you single, don’t you like people?’, answer: ‘Why aren’t you a millionaire, don’t you like money?’

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

17 folks are currently checking 👀

If my memory gets any worse, I’ll be able to plan my own surprise party.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Needs to be a Google Maps setting where you can ask them not to make you take a left across four lanes of oncoming traffic.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Why is everyone so chill about parrots being able to talk? That’s a whole animal. Talking.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Parallel lines have got so much in common, it’s a shame they’ll never meet.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

The way Adele works for 6 months and then disappears for 7 years is very much the work-life balance I’m all about.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Every time a Taco Bell rings, an angel gets diarrhea.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Could you even imagine the crime rate if no one drank coffee or ate bacon.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

The problem with hiding snacks from my kid is that when I forget, they end up being hidden from me too.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

My favorite part of my workday is when I grab my shit and leave.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

If you see me in public, it’s AI.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

237 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,506

Funny Quotes Topics

17,571

Funny Quotes Images

15,506

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,626

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

Sex is fine, but have you ever completed every single thing on your to-do list?

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

Three wise men? I highly doubt that.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has shared:

Girlhood is sitting down in a boiling hot shower instead of dealing with life.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has downloaded:

Asking for a donation like Wikipedia every time someone asks me a question.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

Yesterday, thieves broke into my home. They searched everywhere and found nothing. They beat me up, telling me to work harder.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has viewed:

All my passwords are protected by short term memory loss.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has viewed:

Not working on myself because I make better content this way.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has bookmarked:

I don’t get why banks tie pens with strings. We trust them with money, but they can’t trust us with a single pen.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has shared:

You can’t spell crypto without “cry”.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

Did it hurt, when my ice cream outlasted yours?

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Discord:

If i had $5 for every time I said up yours to someone, my butler would be saying it for me.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Since I started following the wisdom of ancient Chinese philosopher Fuk Yu, my life has been so much better…

Freshly posted on Instagram:

If a door closes, you can just open it again. That is a door. Doors work like this.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

There should be an Olympics where athletes can take as many drugs as they want. Like, to hell with y’all, let’s see how high humans can really jump.

Breaking via Reddit:

It’s almost time to pack away the black summer clothes and unpack the black winter clothes.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Talking to some people is like folding a fitted sheet.

Spotted on Messenger:

In the autumn there are two types of creatures who collect acorns: squirrels and toddlers.

Making waves on Threads:

My stress stresses me out to the point where I’m too stressed to deal with my stress.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Just imagine if farting were as contagious as yawning.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Car naps hit different, especially when you are the one driving.

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