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Home ยป Funny Performance Quotes

35 Funny performance quotes

Funny performance quotes ๐ŸŽญ are like a cheerful high-five โœ‹ to your day, adding a sprinkle of humor to the hustle! Whether you’re smashing goals ๐Ÿฅ… or just trying to survive another Monday ๐Ÿ—“๏ธ, these witty gems will have you chuckling through the chaos. Perfect for team meetings, pep talks, or just a good laugh ๐Ÿ˜„, they’re here to remind us all that even in performance, a little humor goes a long way!

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Welcome to Wordgag! ๐Ÿ˜‰โœŒ๏ธ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’ฅ

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I have two dogs: one dominates, the other is a subwoofer.

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Not to be a nerd, but a well-placed semicolon is hot as hell.

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All I care about is being financially stable and getting sexier.

20 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Sometimes you need to turn the music up louder and sort your shit out.

14 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Being called by your real name in a relationship kinda sounds like a divorce.

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To whoever stole my oversized clock, you owe me big time.

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Home is where the Wi-Fi connects automatically and no one chews loud.

25 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

I could low-key really use a wish right now.

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Not using emoji while texting is my way to show that I’m serious.

11 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

The only running I do is to chase the ice cream truck.

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Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ญ has copied:

Unfortunately, the movie you want to watch is unavailable on your 13 streaming services. You can rent it for $2.99 though.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has copied:

Your Honor, that doesnโ€™t sound like me.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡ท has bookmarked:

I’m clumsy but there are upsides. For example, if I finish my chips and I’m sad there’s no more chips, I look in my lap and I always find chips.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ณ has viewed:

You know that moment when you get up in the morning, you’re full of energy and you can’t wait to get to work? Me neither!

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡ญ has bookmarked:

Be warned: I’m bored. This could get dangerous.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ญ has copied:

Vacations are expensive, but how else could you put a price tag on your kids being ungrateful in a different city.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡ช has bookmarked:

Welcome to your late 40s! From now on you will no longer be in โ€œgood healthโ€ but in โ€œgood health for your ageโ€.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡ช has copied:

Neurodivergents will be like, โ€˜Iโ€™m so tired,โ€™ and then refuse to sleep because they havenโ€™t had enough me time after surviving the day.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡จ has bookmarked:

It seems that after checking my bank account, I need to turn to a life of crime.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ผ has viewed:

Almost fell asleep while putting on the sweater because it got dark for a moment. That’s all you need to know about my morning state.

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