Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

I love being wrong, it’s just like being right except easier and I get to be stupid, which is my favorite thing.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has bookmarked:

Celery is depressing green water wafers.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

Actually, this email could’ve been a meeting. We could’ve spent an hour on the clock talking shit and gossiping. Someone could’ve brought bagels.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

Every gift guide for men is like “A flannel flask to hold your knife flavored whiskey.”

Someone from 🇹🇬 has viewed:

Anytime someone throws a Great Gatsby themed party, I have to assume they never finished the book.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

Everyone’s gangsta till you’re waiting on your dog to poop.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

My heart says, chocolate and wine, but my jeans say “Woman, are you kidding? Eat a salad!”

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

I don’t need a New Year’s resolution, it’s the year’s turn to be better.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

Unless I ask, I genuinely don’t care to hear other people’s opinions on my life. It’s almost a pet peeve, really.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

Home is where you trust the toilet seat.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,725

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Facebook:

Every group chat has that one person who never replies, and it’s me.

Live now on Threads:

My rapper name would be 2 stressd.

Making waves on Messenger:

My favorite exercise is a combination of a lunge and a crunch. It’s called lunch.

Trending via Threads:

There’s poetry in walking away without closing the door too loud.

Shared recently on Discord:

At my age, I’m more frightened of a hip break than a heartbreak.

Trending via Snapchat:

It doesn’t matter how bizarre your situation is. Somebody on Reddit already been there, done that.

Just shared via X:

Some say the world will end in fire. Others say in ice. Coming up next, our expert panel breaks down the arguments for each side…

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I respectfully ignore DMs because I promise you, I am not your soulmate.

Just landed via Instagram:

You know when you tap a video to see how long it’s got left? I wish you could do that to people while they’re talking.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

It’s freezing cold outside and my polar bear won’t start.

Funny pilot quotes

Funny pilot quotes 🛫 bring the sky-high humor you never knew you needed! Whether you’re a frequent flyer or just love aviation ✈️, these witty lines will have you laughing all the way to cruising altitude 😂. Ready to soar through some clever cockpit comedy? Buckle up and enjoy the ride—laughter is cleared for takeoff! 🚀🌤️

New funny pilot quotes 👇

All funny pilot quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

16 shares on Instagram this month:

This post is invisible, and only those going to Hell can see it.

21 shares on YouTube this month:

Sawing a hole in a table from underneath to steal a cake is a lot harder than cartoons would have you believe.

19 shares on Twitch this month:

Anytime I switch deodorants, it’s like a sexy stranger is following me around all day.

61 shares on Facebook this month:

Adult friendships are difficult. The people I get on best with never want to leave the house either.

56 shares on Telegram this month:

I hate when a guy asks “can you cook?” Can you build a house?

40 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I met the real Santa tonight, and he said you’re all in trouble.

17 shares on Twitch this month:

“Likes your story” is a declaration of love.

94 shares on Facebook this month:

Going from “I can fix her” to “I don’t care if she lives or dies” in the same beer.

74 shares on Pinterest this month:

The guy who drills the holes so you can assemble IKEA furniture is clearly having problems at home.

27 shares on Slack this month:

I’ve broken all my New Year’s Resolutions so now I’m moving on to laws of nature.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Started from the bottom, now we a little bit above the bottom.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Paid my mortgage so don’t ask me to come out. I’m getting my money’s worth.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

As president, I will allow people to use the same password as before when changing their password.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Bob is my nickname. Robert is my nicholasname.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Not to brag, but my children already knew everything I told them today.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

My favorite part about being sick is when you sneeze with a cough drop in your mouth and it launches across the room like a cruise missile.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Hear me out: a streaming service that doesn’t keep increasing their prices and actually has movies you want to watch.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I’d change my name to laundry if it meant you’d think about doing me every day.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

The best way to describe this year is to say it feels like a year of Mondays.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Drinking at home is convenient, sure, but it’s nothing like the experience of leaving the pub feeling fifty bucks lighter.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,687

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

You should be allowed to call out of work if you have a really bad nightmare.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

Sometimes the voices in my head get bullied by the voices in my stomach.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

“Apple Music has better sound quality!” Okay, but my entire life is on Spotify, my playlists are my children.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

When they ask “how was your weekend?” answer “better than yours” and maintain eye contact.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

I be skipping everyone’s stories but watch mine like 20 times.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

As a beautiful woman, sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is “ew.”

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

Lego better be trying to cure child cancer with how much their shit cost.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

I relate to a rooster because I also want start off my day by screaming.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has downloaded:

The only constant in my life are the accidental screenshots of my lock screen.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

I live in constant fear that some douchebag is going to show up to a bonfire with a guitar.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Slack:

A lobotomy and a forehead kiss would fix everything.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Why have abs when you can have kebabs?

Seen just now on Messenger:

Time needs a speed limit.

Seen just now on Messenger:

I will not stop replying with gifs. I am a Millennial, it’s my birthright.

Trending via Twitch:

Dating outside of your education bracket leads to misunderstandings and arguments.

Spotted on Threads:

Kinda rude when I spend money, and it actually leaves my bank account. But okay.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I wish every day had 30,000 hours, and that I had unlimited Adderall and was unemployed.

Making waves on Instagram:

How do they know an animal is extinct? Like, have you really looked everywhere?

Just shared via Instagram:

Sorry, I liked your post one second after you posted it but in my defense, I’ve had my phone in my hand since 2012.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I love how every website has a “Keep me signed in on this computer” button and it’s just straight up bullshit.

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