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73 Funny response quotes

Funny response quotes 🤣 are the perfect way to sprinkle some humor into your day! Whether you’re texting a friend, commenting on a post, or just looking to lighten the mood, these witty comebacks and snappy one-liners are sure to get a laugh 😂. Dive into a world where humor meets cleverness and discover the art of the perfect response 🚀. Keep your conversations lively and let the giggles commence! 🥳

I don’t like being asked “are you at home?” Please expand further so I can know whether I’m at home or not.

Posted on5 months ago

“Are you ok?” Of course not. Next question!

Posted onMar 17, 2025

In a job interview, you can always respond to an awkward question with a deep gaze and parted lips, followed by “You complete me.”

Posted onFeb 25, 2025

You tell people you’re not trying to drink and they act like you just turned down 100k.

Posted onFeb 1, 2025Feb 1, 2025

Person: gives compliment. Me: let me give you a brief synopsis of why you are sorely mistaken.

Posted onFeb 1, 2025Feb 1, 2025

Sorry I missed your call. I saw that you were calling and immediately threw my phone into an active volcano.

Posted onFeb 1, 2025Feb 1, 2025

Whenever someone asks me if my dog is adopted I respond with, “no, she’s biologically mine.”

Posted onFeb 1, 2025Feb 1, 2025

I am “any text received after 9pm will be answered at 6am” years old.

Posted onJan 28, 2025

Might mess around and reply “history will absolve me” to all work emails.

Posted onJan 28, 2025

I sent you a message telepathically and you didn’t respond. Are you mad at me?

Posted onJan 28, 2025

Any room can be a panic room if you just give me a second.

Posted onJan 28, 2025

Police officer: please step out of your vehicle. Me: after this song, hold on.

Posted onJan 28, 2025

Sorry I didn’t text you back, I was pretending I didn’t see it and ended up actually forgetting.

Posted onJan 28, 2025

Them: Good morning! Me: Where?

Posted onJan 28, 2025

Apologies for the late response, instead of spending three minutes answering your email, I ignored it and felt anxious for two weeks.

Posted onJan 27, 2025

When they ask “how was your weekend?” answer “better than yours” and maintain eye contact.

Posted onJan 27, 2025

Someone asked me how much I spend on a bottle of wine. 30 minutes was not the right answer.

Posted onJan 27, 2025

Job interviewer: Where do you see yourself in 5 years? Me: I would say my biggest weakness is listening.

Posted onJan 27, 2025

Responding to any and all emails with ‘wow ok’

Posted onJan 27, 2025

Them: “Ugh, could you be more annoying?” Me: “Oh God, yes!”

Posted onJan 27, 2025

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