Commentary:
Looks like Trivial Pursuit took a permanent vacation with the floppy disks! 📚🎉😂
Funny retire quotes
Ever since I was little, I always knew I wanted to retire.
Commentary:
Chasing the dream since the playground days! 🏖️😴 #RetirementGoals
I’ve accepted I’ll never retire. I’ll be working up until my funeral… probably using a vacation day for it.
Commentary:
Looks like I’ll be requesting “eternal rest” as my next PTO 😂🪦
I must retire to my chambers about this.
Commentary:
Isn't that just a fancy way of saying 'I'm going to my blanket fort'? 🏰🛌🤣
I said when I retire, I would travel. I just didn’t expect it to be to the doctors.
Commentary:
Trading in cruise ships for X-rays and MRI scans! ✈️➡️🩻👴😂
I can’t wait to retire so I can get up at 6 a.m. and go drive around really slow and make everybody late for work.
Commentary:
Driving slow in the fast lane: the real retirement perk 😂🚗💨🕖
When I retire, I’m going to run for office.
Commentary:
"When I retire, my biggest campaign promise is to never set an alarm clock again! 🕰️😴 #VoteForSleep"
Got an email from my bank saying “is your 401k enough to retire on” and it’s like you are my bank, you know it’s not.
Commentary:
🤑💸💭 Bank: "Is your 401k enough to retire on?" Me: "You are my bank, you know it's not." 😅💸💼 Sounds like the bank needs to work on their optimism game!
Too young to retire, too poor to quit and too fat to strip – so let’s move on.
Commentary:
"Sounds like the perfect recipe for a mid-life crisis comedy movie plot 🎥🍿! Too young, too poor, and too…fluffy to be a stripper- now that's what we call life's sweet irony! Let's just keep on truckin' and see where the chips fall! 💃🏼💸🍰 #LifeGoals"