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15 Funny swear quotes

Next time I lose my mind I swear I’m not even going to look for it any more.

1 month ago

Any jar is a swear jar when the lid won’t open.

3 months ago

I drive regularly so that my brain doesn’t forget swear words.

3 months ago

Sailors wish they could swear like me.

3 months ago

I like to swear a lot so that people will keep their kids away from me.

3 months ago

I swear people go to Starbucks and just say random words. “Lemme get a grande iced mocha no foam quad soy hexagon vortex hypothesis with steamed ice”.

3 months ago

I swear, one more minor inconvenience and I’m running away to join the circus.

3 months ago

Any jar is a swear jar when the lid won’t open.

3 months ago

My swear jar is filing for an IPO soon.

3 months ago

My swear jar is having a very profitable week.

3 months ago

A swear jar for Twitter would end world hunger.

3 months ago

Human interaction is a great way to learn all the new swear words your subconscious mind has come up with in the lab.

3 months ago

A Twitter swear jar could end world hunger.

3 months ago

IKEA assembly instructions should come with a glossary of Swedish swear words.

3 months ago

One of my biggest talents is taking hundreds of screenshots that I swear I’ll need, but I never look at them again.

3 months ago