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11 Funny team quotes

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HR: “Please complete our anonymous survey.” My boss then later: “Don’t forget the survey, HR said you are the last one from our team.”
A designated hitter in baseball is the one who has to hit for everyone in case the team is drunk.
There’s someone in our team who behaves horribly to me and whenever I have to type his name, I’ve taken to using a slightly smaller font size than for everyone else’s.
After an hour on this team meeting I’m not wanting to be a team player anymore.
Imagine the carnage at an IKEA team building event.

New funny team quotes 👇

4 months ago
Share →: My life coach told me I didn’t make the team.

Commentary:
Well, who needs a life coach when you've got rejection coming at you left and right? 🤷‍♂️ Looks like even the team didn't want you, but hey, at least you have a great sense of humor to fall back on! 😉 Just think of it as an opportunity to excel in solo sports like napping or Netflix marathons. 🏆 Keep that chin up, champ!
5 months ago
Share →: The only team building exercise we had when I started working was called “Happy Hour.”

Commentary:
Looks like their team building strategy was to build relationships with the help of some liquid courage! 🥂 Who needs trust falls and trust exercises when you can bond over a few drinks instead? 😄 #HappyHourTeamBuilding
5 months ago
Share →: Blocking him isn’t enough. I want his favorite sports team to finish last every year for now and forever.

Commentary:
"Blocking him on social media is just the beginning…may his favorite team forever be stuck in last place 🏆🤣 Let karma handle the rest! ⚽️🏀🏈"
5 months ago
Share →: Whoever said “team work makes the dream work” needs to explain that to my many personalities.

Commentary:
"Whoever said 'team work makes the dream work' clearly never met all the characters in my head who can't agree on anything 🤯🤷‍♂️ Looks like my squad is more like a chaotic committee than a well-oiled team! 😂 #OnePersonManyPersonalities"
5 months ago
Share →: A designated hitter in baseball is the one who has to hit for everyone in case the team is drunk.

Commentary:
"Ah, the designated hitter – the team's trusty savior when the rest of them have had a few too many curveballs! 🍻⚾️ Better watch out for those home runs… and hangovers! 😄"
5 months ago
Share →: If I turned into a “teen wolf”, my first order of business would definitely be helping my basketball team get to the local championships.

Commentary:
"Imagine how epic the local championships would be with a basketball team led by a 'teen wolf' 🐺🏀🌟 Breaking ankles and setting records – it's a slam dunk for success! Who needs Michael Jordan when you've got a werewolf on the court? Let's howl for victory! 🌕🐾🏆"
5 months ago
Share →: HR: “Please complete our anonymous survey.” My boss then later: “Don’t forget the survey, HR said you are the last one from our team.”

Commentary:
🤦‍♂️ "Ah, the classic 'anonymous' survey – HR's way of finding out who has the best handwriting in the office! And of course, nothing says 'anonymous' quite like your boss singling you out as the last one to complete it. Smooth move, HR, real smooth. 📝😂"
5 months ago
Share →: There’s someone in our team who behaves horribly to me and whenever I have to type his name, I’ve taken to using a slightly smaller font size than for everyone else’s.

Commentary:
Ah, the art of subtle shade! 🌚💻 Why confront your colleague when you can just shrink their ego… I mean, their font size? 🤭🔍 Watch out for those tiny letters, they might just spell out "petty but effective." 😏 #OfficeDrama #PassiveAggressiveDesign
5 months ago
Share →: Imagine the carnage at an IKEA team building event.

Commentary:
"Can you picture the chaos at an IKEA team building event? 🤯 Participants trying to assemble a teamwork tower but ending up with a dysfunctional chair! 😂 It would definitely test their patience and bond them through the shared struggle of understanding cryptic instructions! 🛠️😆 #TeamworkFail"
5 months ago
Share →: After an hour on this team meeting I’m not wanting to be a team player anymore.

Commentary:
Looks like someone's ready to trade in their team player jersey for a lone wolf outfit! 🐺Who knew a team meeting could have such powerful anti-team building effects? 😅 Just remember, teamwork makes the dream work…or at least that's what they say! #TeamMeetingBlues