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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

Mud season creeps up on us every year, destroying hearts and minds as well as light grey carpeting.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

When I become president, any public holiday that falls on a Thursday automatically extends to Friday.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

I really miss my family… sized bag of crisps.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

Spotify Wrapped: February was your basketball watermelon loudspeaker phone call hip hop moment.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

What is the morning wood equivalent for women, and why do I always have it?

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

Starting your most incoherent sentence with “put simply” to deflect blame onto the reader.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

Gonna break into your house, toast all your bread and put it back in the bag.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has viewed:

The first 120 hours after the weekend are always the worst.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

My car accidentally drove to a burger shop again. I hate when it does that.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

Shoutout to Netflix for being the only one that checks in on me every few hours. “Are you still watching?” Yeah, babe, thank you for asking.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,529

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Slack:

Yawning is the body’s way of telling you it has only 15% battery remaining.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

If Microsoft Edge is brave enough to ask to be your default browser, you can be brave enough to ask that girl out.

Spotted on Discord:

One thing I hate more than a liar is a liar that thinks I’m dumb.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Nostalgia isn’t as good as it used to be.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Another fine day ruined by waking up.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Eating the sticker on an apple counts as 35% of your daily fiber intake.

Just shared via Messenger:

Having sex with the same person gets freakier and nastier each time.

Just landed via X:

I don’t need to learn something new, I need to remember something old, like why did I come into this room?

Going bananas on Reddit:

You have to be careful about sending your spouse things on social media. You send too many things, next thing you know chores are being redistributed because of “all the free time you clearly have”.

Funny townsfolk quotes

New funny townsfolk quotes 👇

Good morning, townsfolk. I’m here to slay the monsters.

1 month ago

good, here, monster, monsters, morning, slay, townsfolk

All funny townsfolk quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

37 shares on Threads this month:

Twitter is a prime example why most of us shouldn’t be left unsupervised.

85 shares on Pinterest this month:

22 shares on Threads this month:

I don’t call them exes, I call them whys.

63 shares on Snapchat this month:

The secret to being able to buy whatever you want is not wanting much.

25 shares on Messenger this month:

Dating app that matches you based on your risk tolerance for airport arrival timing.

19 shares on Reddit this month:

So I just keep making dinner? Every night of my life? For forever?

14 shares on Discord this month:

It’s unfortunate that scrubbing the floors on your hands and knees is so much more effective than mopping.

45 shares on WeChat this month:

I wish anxiety came with french fries.

28 shares on Twitch this month:

I can admit that I am intrigued by people weirder than I am.

50 shares on Twitch this month:

You hit a couple of curbs, take out a trash can and all of a sudden it’s “you can’t drive”.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

I’m going spiraling, do you need anything?

Someone from 🇭🇺 has downloaded:

I was having a great time until I remembered that I was ugly.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

Taking off my house pajamas to put on my errands pajamas.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

Divorce is so weird. Why do I have an ex-aunt?

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

The highlight of my weekends is slipping into something more comfortable and putting my feet up.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

My toxic trait is thinking I deserve a break after sending one email.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

Behind every funny man is a woman who rolls her eyes.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

If I’m wrongly accused of a crime, I’m going to prison. I’m way too introverted to have an alibi.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has viewed:

Biggest flex is when your friend’s mom uses you as a good example.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has bookmarked:

My wife asked me to put ketchup on the shopping list that I was making, and now, I can’t read anything.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WeChat:

My tombstone will read “Hey there, I’m using WhatsApp!”.

Just landed via YouTube:

Demi Lovato is short for demilitarized love potato.

Just landed via Instagram:

Trying to work outside on a laptop is like sunbathing on a melting ice cube.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I’m just here trying to spread a little joy while the world burns. Is that so wrong?

Just landed via Facebook:

Adding “Free HBO” to your dating profile isn’t the game changer you’d think it’d be.

Trending via WhatsApp:

It’s Sunday. I’ve slept in and ignored church. Somewhere the devil is sitting and clicking on “Like”.

Seen just now on YouTube:

There’s just one legitimate synonym for Friday: boom shakalaka.

Just landed via Facebook:

It’s amazing how much I accomplish around the house right before someone is coming over.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Stereotypes are like mass graves. They’re both offensive ways to lump groups of people together.

Just landed via Instagram:

Rehab is a great place to meet people that like Piña Coladas and getting caught in the rain.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny townsfolk quotes

New funny townsfolk quotes 👇

Good morning, townsfolk. I’m here to slay the monsters.

All funny townsfolk quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨