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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

Lazy is such an ugly word. I prefer to call it selective participation.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

Іf you’re sad about being alone on Valentine’s Day, just remember that nobody loves you on any other day of the year either.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

Every time we try to eat healthy, along comes Christmas, Easter, summer, Friday, or Tuesday, and ruins it for us.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

Just saw a piece of jewelry made in the 80s described as “vintage,” so I’ll be laying down the rest of the day.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

Are you bad wifi, cause im feeling no connection here.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

Still holding out hope that these intrusive thoughts are just gas.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

Hear me out, a Q-Tip that doesn’t bounce out the trash can when you throw it away.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

Just overheard someone describe their hike as “it was like mountain climbing, but flat”.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

Gonna end every insult with “but in a good way”.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has viewed:

I feel bad for Slash. He bought a goofy hat in like 1986 and now he has to wear it until the day he dies.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

779 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,941

Funny Quotes Topics

13,912

Funny Quotes Images

10,941

Updated

58 minutes ago

Users Online

3,436

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Reddit:

My favorite part of football is when they feed the players water like they’re hamsters.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

So many true crime podcasts are just like “a young woman went missing, the police took a week to respond, she was last seen with a man the community call Creepy Steve, he has never been questioned”

Making waves on Twitch:

I sometimes have the desire to meet certain people again for the first time. Only to simply walk past them.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

“Would you like to check your account balance?” God no. My balance is none of my business.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

The difference between a Lamborghini and a dead body is that I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

My coffee and I used to be hot. Now, we’re just bitter.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

I’m so hungry, I could eat my own cooking.

Going viral on Messenger:

Please don’t send me mixed signals, I don’t even understand the clear ones.

Freshly posted on X:

Do men know they don’t have to keep their clothing until it disintegrates?

Going viral on Reddit:

“Can’t wait till I get older” was the dumbest thing I ever said.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

779 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,941

Funny Quotes Topics

13,912

Funny Quotes Images

10,941

Updated

58 minutes ago

Users Online

3,423

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇾 has bookmarked:

There are people that make their bed every morning and people who think it’s a waste of time, and then they marry each other.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has viewed:

If you live in the same hemisphere as me, you’ve probably already heard me sneeze.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has viewed:

I have nothing nice to wear for the government shutdown.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

I’m at the age where I understand why my parents never wanted to stop for anything on the way home from work.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

I hate it when some random company refers to me as their “customer.” I’m like, look, we had one night of drunken shopping, we are not in a relationship.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has bookmarked:

Make it a habit to cry and act unhinged at meetings so you’re never invited back.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

I googled my symptoms and it turns out I just need this election to be over.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has copied:

It’s funny how cats have ears on top of their head, but don’t use them.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

You should be able to call in sad to work.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

For someone who is afraid of failure, I’m very unmotivated.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on X:

Fake laughing with customers is actually a job skill.

Just shared via Discord:

I remixed a remix, it was back to normal.

Just landed via Snapchat:

I would love to have children one day. Two days maximum.

Live now on Twitch:

I wish I loved anything as much as my two year old loves pulling my pants down.

Just landed via YouTube:

I totally get why Leonardo DiCaprio is trying to save the environment for future generations. They could be his girlfriend.

Freshly posted on Slack:

The number one rule of Thanksgiving dinner is take your own vehicle so you can leave on your own terms.

Making waves on Threads:

Love those deep burps that instantly make me feel like I lost 10 lbs.

Going viral on Discord:

I finally got 8 hours of sleep. Took me four days, but whatever.

Just shared via TikTok:

I tried to scream into the abyss today but got a busy signal.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

People tell me to just be myself like that would be a good thing.

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