Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • The billionaires have decided that the people with nothing have too much.
  • I probably never die because I don’t finish anything without a specific deadline.
  • Called myself to see if I’d answer, sent me to voicemail. Twice.
  • 80 years ago we would have all been institutionalized and I think that’s beautiful.
  • Welcome to your 40s, the best part of your day is now the heated seats in your car after a long day.
  • I just tried to poach an egg and I now understand why Eggs Benedict is $23