Commentary:
Zooming to space without a rocket! 🚀🤯✨
38 Funny stand quotes
I hate interviewing. Just hire me. I stand on business, for real.
Commentary:
When they ask me about my skills, I just tell them I’m fluent in sarcasm and can nap with unmatched diligence 😂💼 #HiredYet?
My dad told my sister’s new boyfriend to stand at the end of the picture so he can crop him out whenever she dumps him.
Commentary:
Looks like sis's boyfriend is in the official "probation perimeter" of the family photos! 😂📸✂️
I have to stand in the shower about this.
Commentary:
Trying to solve life’s mysteries one shampoo bottle at a time 🚿🤔🛁
Can’t stand when I’m determined to see something in a negative light, and somebody offers a different, healthier perspective. I already made up my mind to be upset. Don’t be rude.
Commentary:
Well, how dare they serve me a reality check when I already ordered a full course of drama! 🍽️😤📦
A perfect metaphor for my life would be “Someone trying to stand up in a hammock.”
Commentary:
Trying to adult like: 🎪😅 Who knew balancing on a hammock was also a life skill!
Let’s all stand up against iron deficiency (but not too fast).
Commentary:
I'm all for this cause, just need a minute to get dizzy first! 🥴💪🍎
Sometimes I just stand in the sun and stare at nothing, like a dog.
Commentary:
Just embracing my inner solar-powered pupper! ☀️🐶
Every time I stand up, my dog gets excited as hell. He understands that I’m a real man who can make shit happen at any given moment.
Commentary:
😂🐾 "When I stand, my dog thinks I'm a superhero on the move! Only problem is, the biggest 'mission' I embark on is finding the TV remote. 🦸♂️📺"
My husband is looking for the remote control. I need everyone to stand up for a minute.
Commentary:
"When finding the remote needs military precision. Everyone, prepare for 'Operation Sofa Search'! 🛋️🔍🤣"