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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ท๐Ÿ‡ผ has downloaded:

Forget Spotify Wrapped. Iโ€™m more interested in seeing your Pornhub Wrapped.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has bookmarked:

Vatican City should be called Popenhagen.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ญ has downloaded:

I’m sorry, I didn’t realize that you’re an expert on my life and how I should live it! Please continue while I take notes.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡น has copied:

Of course I look tired, itโ€™s hard pretending to be awake.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ซ๐Ÿ‡ฎ has downloaded:

I avoid drama by being unpopular.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ญ๐Ÿ‡บ has shared:

I look stable, but I talk to animals, and wait for them to reply.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ถ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has copied:

I wish it were social acceptable to say โ€œI donโ€™t careโ€ and walk away mid conversation when youโ€™re bored.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ฎ has copied:

Everyone has that one friend theyโ€™ve known for years and still have no idea what they actually do for a living, but itโ€™s too late to ask.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡พ๐Ÿ‡ช has bookmarked:

Me: Do you have the movie I want to watch? Netflix: No, but we have hundreds of movies that you don’t want to watch!

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ผ has bookmarked:

I donโ€™t want your hoodie, I want your still-beating heart presented to me in a box.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

calculatingโ€ฆ

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,510

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Trending via Pinterest:

I canโ€™t think of a single email that has ever found me well.

Just landed via YouTube:

We can’t use nicknames at work anymore, and I blame Teletubby.

Making waves on X:

Some people are like ads, just skip.

Trending via Slack:

The sexual tension between me and buying more books.

Going viral on Telegram:

People acting all happy and energized first thing in the morning. Chill out! You arenโ€™t a Teletubby.

Trending via Discord:

I gotta ask, what part of โ€˜I donโ€™t eat sugarโ€™ donโ€™t I understand?

Just landed via Telegram:

If my wife doesn’t win anything on this $2 scratch ticket, it’s going to go down as one of the worst birthday presents ever.

Breaking via Threads:

I should get paid a lot more for being the boss of me.

Just shared via Instagram:

Always remember you’re unique, just like everyone else.

Spotted on YouTube:

The season is back when women are 80% scarf.

I hope this email kills us both.

Humorous quote about workplace stress, expressing dark humor with witty email frustration.
Download image โ†“

Commentary:
Subject: The Dreaded Email Monster ๐Ÿ’Œ๐Ÿ‘น

"Ah, the infamous email of doom has arrived! ๐Ÿ’€ Brace yourselves, my dear recipient, for this digital beast means business! ๐Ÿ“ง๐Ÿ”ฅ Will we survive the wrath of its unread notifications and overwhelming subject lines, or succumb to its deadly attachments? Stay strong, my friend, and may we meet again on the other side of the inbox abyss! ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’ป #EmailNightmare"

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Keep the laugh going ๐Ÿ˜‚

Trending Funny Quotes ๐Ÿ‘‡

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars โญ

23 shares on WeChat this month:

Being lazy has its advantages. I still have most of my winter fat from last year.

19 shares on Pinterest this month:

Needing to rant and not wanting anyone to know your business is such a crazy combo.

17 shares on TikTok this month:

Kinda rude my neighbors live next to me.

11 shares on Slack this month:

Be nice to me, I may be hot one day.

19 shares on YouTube this month:

Marry the man who treats your dumb questions like theyโ€™re NASA-level problems.

48 shares on Facebook this month:

Sorry for acting weird, I am weird, and it will happen again.

24 shares on Snapchat this month:

You gotta be careful: don’t say a word to nobody about nothing anytime ever.

86 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Having children is like living in a frat house – nobody sleeps, everything’s broken, and there’s a lot of throwing up.

46 shares on Snapchat this month:

I don’t know who needs to hear this right now, but it’s time to fold the laundry that’s been lying around since last Sunday.

53 shares on Telegram this month:

People in my real life annoy me, so I come online to annoy you.

Trending Topics ๐Ÿ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes ๐Ÿ’ฅ

10 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

I’m an ethical hater. My hate towards you is informed, balanced, and deeply nuanced.

8 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

How did Satoshi write the code of Bitcoin before Claude?

23 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Insane that you have to defend yourself at the end of the Ph. D.! Why are you attacking me? Iโ€™m so tired.

19 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

British people be like “It’s Chewsday, innit?”

24 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Showers are the best places to lose arguments with yourself.

5 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

ROMO (relief of missing out)

18 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

I need a massage for my brain.

6 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

If only guys would moan in bed like they do in the gym…

8 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Donโ€™t ask me why, but the older you get, the more you love coffee.

12 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

I wanna marry someone funnier than me, but sadly, I am the funniest.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

calculatingโ€ฆ

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,305

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ป has downloaded:

โ€œStop thinking about it.โ€ Wow, thank you, I am cured. You should write a book.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ญ๐Ÿ‡ณ has copied:

A real smart TV would increase the volume when you start eating chips.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ณ has viewed:

Life is just resetting your password until you die.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฐ has viewed:

I can always tell what part of my cycle Iโ€™m in by how concerned my friends are over my Tweets.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฟ has copied:

One of my biggest talents is taking hundreds of screenshots that I swear Iโ€™ll need, but I never look at them again.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has bookmarked:

Petition to allow customer service employees to fight at least one customer per day.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ช has shared:

If it turns cold one more time, Iโ€™m gonna put the Christmas tree back up.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡ธ has bookmarked:

Not arguing with people anymore, Iโ€™m just gonna say โ€œit makes sense that you would think thatโ€.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ญ๐Ÿ‡บ has shared:

Today, I started a 28-day no-swearing challenge, which I will restart tomorrow.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ธ has downloaded:

As long as I’m alive, I can begin again and again and again, again and again and again, again and again and again.

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Making waves on WeChat:

This going into the office stuff blows. Like, I seriously have to wear clothes now.

Seen just now on Twitch:

I absolutely loooooove getting in the bed. The excitement of finally laying down? Unmatched.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

What I lack in moves on the dance floor, I more than make up for in dancing around a conversation.

Making waves on Reddit:

My passport probably thinks I’m in prison.

Just landed via Instagram:

Iโ€™m โ€œI canโ€™t sit like that for too longโ€ years old.

Just landed via Discord:

Patience is for beginners. I’d rather freak out straight away!

Making waves on Reddit:

Facing my uncle’s dreaded lightning bolt attack at the Thanksgiving dinner table.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can’t even get into my own pants.

Live now on Pinterest:

How inappropriate is it to ask a stranger to scratch your back? Need to know ten minutes ago.

Breaking via Pinterest:

Blocking someone isnโ€™t enough; I need their PornHub videos to always buffer, just as they’re about to climax.

ยฉ 2026. All rights reserved.

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