Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

Apologies about the delay to your flight. We’re just waiting for one 3D printed part, but apparently a ‘fuselage’ takes a little time.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

If you relate to me, get some help!

Someone from 🇲🇻 has shared:

Today, I used a wire I’ve kept in my box of cables since 2011. Please applaud.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

If someone texts “Do you have a minute,” it’s a trick. Don’t fall for it.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

If you’re tired of “food” and want to try something a bit more sophisticated, may I recommend “cuisine”?

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

Hey dude, I recently became omniscient, and well, you fell off in every universe.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has viewed:

I’m at the age where, if you ask me to go out after 9 p.m., I’m definitely not coming.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

I don’t drink alcohol. I like suffering raw.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has downloaded:

Hawk o the mornin tuah

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

Never understood when the movie rating says “May contain nudity.” Are there people on the ratings board who aren’t sure if they just saw someone naked?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,674

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WeChat:

Restaurants: put your phone down, live in the moment. Also, scan our QR code and browse our menu.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

There should be a day between Sunday and Monday called Hang on a Second.

Making waves on Messenger:

What career is most compatible with the unemployed lifestyle?

Live now on YouTube:

I gave you a follow back, not a Tinder match, don’t “Hey, beautiful” me.

Shared recently on Discord:

I’m starting to think the voice in my head doesn’t like me very much.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Strange new trend at the office. People putting names on food in the company fridge. Today I had a tuna sandwich named Linda.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I hate when someone you love says mean things like, “It’s time to wake up.”

Trending via TikTok:

Who is this Rorschach guy and where did he get all the pictures of my parents fighting?

Live now on Telegram:

One day you burned a CD for the last time and didn’t even realize it.

Spotted on WeChat:

Making dinner with my left hand, so it feels like someone else is doing it.

I know my limits. I don’t always obey them, but I know them.

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Commentary:
"Who needs limits when you have sheer determination and a sprinkle of rebellious spirit? 💪🚫 Pushing boundaries is an art form after all! 🎨😜"

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Keep the laugh going 😂

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Social Media Stars ⭐

45 shares on Telegram this month:

Accordion to current studies, 90% of you did not realize that this sentence started with a musical instrument.

48 shares on Twitch this month:

Sitting with my legs really wide to experiment with gender.

63 shares on Instagram this month:

Hawk o the mornin tuah

49 shares on Twitch this month:

Hello darkness, my old friend. Why are you here? It’s 6:00 pm.

67 shares on Instagram this month:

4 sneezes in a row is clout chasing. Wrap it up!

60 shares on TikTok this month:

Telemarketer: “Hello, am I speaking to the head of the household?” Me, handing the phone to my cat: “It’s for you.”

37 shares on Reddit this month:

At the end of the day, the day is going to end.

66 shares on Instagram this month:

Gonna waterboard my houseplants so they know who’s the boss.

13 shares on TikTok this month:

If I ever had to fight a bear, I hope it’s a gummy bear.

22 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Running from your problems is cardio.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Why is it that your clothes only get caught on the door handle when you’re in a bad mood?

8 folks are currently checking 👀

If I got a Dollar for every time I thought about you, I would start thinking about you.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Opening this app is like lighting a cigarette.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Life is strange. We come into the world with nothing, then we struggle for everything, and finally, we leave with nothing.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

If I say I love you, it’s just the apocalypse talking.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

The ultimate student paradox: skipping class to avoid stress, only to stress about skipping class!

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Men love when you ask them to explain something to you. It is considered a sign of deep respect in their culture.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

My toxic trait is thinking I can nap, then waking up 3 hours later in a parallel universe where I missed everything.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I feel bad for those that don’t enjoy their own company. I be having a ball by myself.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,337

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

Soccer: I love when they hold up the sign and a brand new, beautiful boy takes the place of a dirty, sweaty, ruined one.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

Taking screenshots of the screenshots buried in my photo library to ‘bring them to the front.’ It’s not a great system, I admit.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

I feel sorry for dogs. They learnt to fetch newspapers, but newspapers are dying. Killed by an internet driven by cats.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

Apparently the term for migraine-sufferer is ‘migraneur.’ Nice getting recognition as a kind of artisan of suffering.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

My sleep schedule and I are not on speaking terms.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has bookmarked:

I love when my brain cells kiss and I have an idea.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

Maybe I prefer my ducks scattered about.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

Meow means woof in cat.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

Needs to be a Google Maps setting where you can ask them not to make you take a left across four lanes of oncoming traffic.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

It seems a little unfair that the people who want to go to bed have to put the people to bed who don’t want to go to bed.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Threads:

I’ve named my couch American Idle.

Just landed via Snapchat:

I love how you get on Twitter, and all your thoughts are already in someone else’s tweet.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

Adding “Free HBO” to your dating profile isn’t the game changer you’d think it’d be.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

A peaceful transition of power happening between me and this red wine just now.

Breaking via Threads:

Just know that somebody out there is thinking of you, and you should really lock your doors.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Can we not just call it Zealand now?

Going bananas on X:

How old is older? Because I’m still waiting for this wise thing to kick in.

Trending via Threads:

The art of letting whoever think whatever.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

I have feelings for you but you have to guess which ones.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

It’s not fair when attractive people are also good at things.

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