Trendy Funny Quotes

  • I don’t even believe myself when I say I’ll be ready in 5 minutes.
  • Does refusing to go to the gym count as resistance training?
  • I always ask for a receipt so I can keep them in my purse for 86 years.
  • Me before grocery shopping: only healthy foods, no impulse buys, I can do this. Me during grocery shopping: they make chocolate filled marshmallows?
  • If God did not intend for us to eat animals, then why did he make them out of meat?
  • If you think swimming with dolphins is expensive, you should try swimming with sharks. It cost me an arm and a leg!