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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

Naked and Afraid because there’s a spider in the shower with me.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

My longest relationship has been with my Hotmail account.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

Lasagna has never broken my heart. Just saying.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

Flirting when bored can really get you into some unwanted situations.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

“I could see myself living here,” I said, in a different city for more than 24 hours.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

“I’m gonna decide everyone’s pronouns and sexuality tonight. And, yes, there will be some big surprises.”

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

If you’re riding in my car, that little middle piece is for my elbow — not yours.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

Technically, all the money I have ever spent on food has been flushed down the toilet.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

I’m not really a “glass half full” kind of person. I’m more of a “Where’d I put my glass?” kind of person.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has shared:

Ruin a perfectly nice trip out with your child by bringing your child.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,722

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Reddit:

I would rather walk directly into the ocean than tell people a fun fact about myself.

Spotted on Threads:

Flex on your kids by asking “are we there yet?” before they do.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Eleven out of ten people are stupid.

Spotted on Pinterest:

My son put his dish in the sink so I rushed him to urgent care.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Every citizen over 18 should be eligible to be drafted into the Postal Service.

Trending via YouTube:

Conflicts may arise but always remember to be the bitter person.

Making waves on Messenger:

Imagine hating me and I’m just over here doing an epic air-drum solo to ‘In The Air Tonight’.

Seen just now on Messenger:

All I’m saying is that big burgers should be wider not taller.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

Bruce Lee had a faster older brother named Sudden Lee.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Coffee ain’t gonna cut it today. I need the blood of my enemies.

I’m not humiliating myself here for 3 likes. 10 maybe but not 3.

1 month ago

Witty quote about social media ego and self-awareness with a humorous tone.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When it comes to social media validation, the struggle is real! 😂👏 Who knew the difference between 3 likes and 10 could be so significant? Remember, it's all about maximizing that digital clout, one like at a time! 📱💥 #DoItForTheDoubleDigits

attention, here, humiliation, joke, likes, media, myself, self-esteem, social, social media, validation, worth

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

12 shares on Instagram this month:

You should always wear a helmet when doing dangerous things or talking about politics.

49 shares on Threads this month:

Is this art or trash?

41 shares on Reddit this month:

Life always has it’s ups and downs. I like to up the music, down the drinks, and then relax and enjoy.

41 shares on Messenger this month:

I have heard that people without dogs have to pick up dropped food themselves.

19 shares on Telegram this month:

I am not the person I thought I was when I cut that donut in half.

13 shares on Facebook this month:

Sex is so embarrassing. Like, why did I want to do that to you?

32 shares on Twitch this month:

As a pigeon mother, I would never let my pigeon daughter hang around the station. That’s really no place for a young pigeon lady.

93 shares on Snapchat this month:

If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing?

59 shares on YouTube this month:

Aren’t you a little old to be a bully?

55 shares on Reddit this month:

My son loves Monty Python. My work here is done.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

24 folks are currently checking 👀

The hottest thing a man can do is exactly what he said he was going to.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t understand why “family-run” should be a sign of quality. North Korea, for example, is also family-run and doesn’t convince me at all.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

My husband pissed me off so I wrapped his remote and put it under the tree.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

You can’t truly refer to yourself as an adult until you catch yourself getting really angry when the grocery store changes their layout.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing has paid off less than learning to do the Macarena.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

At this point, I’m sure I’ll meet an alien or zombies before I meet the love of my life!

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t be afraid to ask questions during a job interview. It’s the best way to find out if the person you’re interviewing is a good candidate for the job.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I want to be in Metallica, and they will not let me.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Asking my boyfriend if he would still date me if an alien had done experiments on me that killed me but, as a gesture of kindness, replaced me with a perfect replica, and he was the only one who knew.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Most people think that I’m arrogant, but who cares what peasants think.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,707

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

We should start referring to age as “levels.” So when you’re level 80, it sounds a lot cooler than just being an older person.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

I wonder whatever happened to the tiny dogs all of those terrible women were carrying around in their purses.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

Wrapping gifts on the floor after 50: 1% holiday spirit, 99% figuring out how to stand up without calling for help.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

The reason the world felt like a better place during your childhood is because you were a child.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

Why are there people outside at the same time as me? It’s my turn.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

Becoming a psychic for the foreseeable future.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

If two witches watched two watches, which witch would watch which watch? Each witch would watch which watch belonged to which witch’s wrist.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

I deserve a treat when I have a bad week, but I also deserve a treat when I have a good week. I simply always deserve treats.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

It’s so unfair that saying “xd” is still socially acceptable, but only if you’re speaking Spanish.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has bookmarked:

Always funny to see motivational posts from people I know are toxic in real life.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Her idea of a romantic setting is one that has a diamond in it.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Stages of Christmas shopping: 1. There’s plenty of time. 2. Oh no!

Going bananas on Pinterest:

The lion does not concern himself with social proof.

Breaking via Telegram:

The worst part of online shopping is having to get up and get your card out of your wallet.

Just landed via Messenger:

The urge to say “yeah, you should do that”, especially when you have no clue.

Making waves on Threads:

Girlhood is taking hundreds of pictures only to post one or none at all.

Making waves on Facebook:

I shaved my legs today and it was the fastest 3lbs I’ve ever lost in my life.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

There’s nothing like sitting by an open fire and watching the evidence burn.

Spotted on Messenger:

My car accidentally drove to a burger shop again. I hate when it does that.

Making waves on Telegram:

Blackout curtains because I’ll decide what time it is.

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