Is it fall yet? I really can’t suck my stomach in much longer.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

Every girl’s personal hell is being too excited about their birthday and it ends up being the worst day ever.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

Not to brag but there are so many movies out there that have watched me sleep.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

When someone tells me “They could care less”, instead of the proper “I couldn’t care less”, I always say “At least you care.”

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

I’m a yapper. I’m a napper. I’m a midnight snacker.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

If it turns cold one more time, I’m gonna put the Christmas tree back up.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

My dad called my philosophy degree a “license for unemployment.”

Someone from 🇸🇻 has viewed:

Me driving at night: I hope this is the road!

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

Sure sex is cool, but have you ever farted away a stomachache?

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

Would it kill the makers of avocados to put a different toy inside?

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

I’m not saying I’m messy, but if Copperfield knew what I can make disappear, he’d be jealous.