It is only when a mosquito lands on your testicles that you realize there is always a way to solve problems without using violence.

It is only when a mosquito lands on your testicles that you realize there is always a way to solve problems without using violence.

Commentary:
“Who knew a tiny mosquito could teach us such a valuable lesson in diplomacy and self-control 🦟🤭 Always remember, violence is never the answer, especially when sensitive areas are involved! 😅”

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • have one of those big paintings with the eyeholes cut out, but I don’t have anyone to spy on, so I just watch TV through it.

    Commentary:
    Just imagine the scene: lurking behind a big painting with eyeholes, hoping for some thrilling espionage, but ending up just watching reality TV… Truly a cutting-edge form of surveillance! 🕵️‍♂️📺 #SpyingOnMyNetflixQueue

  • My husband threw away a perfectly good box as if we might not need it in 20 years.

    Commentary:
    📦 “Ah, the classic case of ‘box tossing remorse’ – who knew that a simple cardboard container could spark such existential uncertainty? 🤔 Perhaps in 20 years, that box will be celebrated as a lost treasure, forever haunting your husband’s dreams… 😅 Just remember, in the world of boxes, one person’s trash is another person’s future storage solution!”

  • I’m so smart, I got rid of cable and now I only have $638 in monthly streaming services.

    Commentary:
    “Who needs cable when you can pay for multiple streaming services and still have money left over for… well, not much 🤑💸 Don’t worry, your brainpower will surely help you find a way to cut costs… maybe. 😅📺 #StreamingOverload”

  • When I am calculating any risk, I think to myself: is this first cat life behavior? Or ninth cat life behavior?

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the eternal conundrum of cat behavior! 🐱 Is it a daring leap of faith like a first cat life, or a reckless daredevil act like a ninth cat life? The line between curiosity and catastrophe is as thin as a hairball on a tightrope! 😅”

  • Back in the good old days, we didn’t have to trim our toenails, they just got wore down naturally from running from dinosaurs.

    Commentary:
    Ah, the prehistoric pedicure method – a true blast from the past! 🦕💅 Who needs nail clippers when you have dinosaurs to keep your toenails in check? Just imagine the cardio workout from all that running! Talk about a unique fitness routine. 😂 #ThrowbackThursday #DinoManicure

  • Had salad for the third night in a row and now I get why you’re so angry, vegans.

    Commentary:
    “Looks like someone’s experiencing the ‘lettuce rage’ syndrome! 🥗😂 Don’t worry, you can always sneak in a burger for dessert! 🍔😉”