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Looks like Monday showed up uninvited, like that one guest who always overstays their welcome 🙄 Don't worry, you've got this! Embrace the chaos with a big cup of coffee ☕ and a sprinkle of optimism ✨ #MondayBlues

again, expectation, humor, i, irony, just, Monday, procrastination, routine, week

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Choosing to ignore my strangely symbolic dream because I have a lot going on right now already.

1 month ago
busy, choices, dream, going, i, ignore, life, lot, priorities, right, stress, symbolic
Statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarfs aren’t happy.

1 month ago
dwarf, happiness, happy, humor, joke, melancholy, statistic, statistically
I may not understand women, but cheeseburgers have never sent me mixed signals, and for that they’ll always have my heart.

2 months ago
always, cheeseburger, food, heart, humor, i, love, me, mixed, mixed signals, relationship, signals, understand, women
To the tune of ‘Everybody Dance Now’: Himalayan Sea Salt

1 month ago
dance, food, fun, Himalayan, humor, parody, salt, sea, sea salt, song, tune
Does everyone have that one colleague at work who puts you in a bad mood just by looking at them?

1 month ago
bad, bad mood, colleague, everyone, humor, just, looking, mood, negativity, office, work
I love how spring sprung and then disappeared again.

1 month ago
again, change, disappearance, disappeared, humor, i, irony, love, nature, seasonal, spring, weather

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Someone from 🇧🇿 has shared:

Smoking will kill you. Bacon will kill you. Ironically, smoking bacon will cure it.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has copied:

If you’re ever intimidated by someone just imagine them opening a Capri Sun.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

“Well at least I don’t have to wake up any more.” Is what I want my tombstone to say.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

Marriage is where you gasp while your husband is driving, and he gets super annoyed over and over.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has copied:

I’m far too underqualified for adult life, and I feel like I was promoted to manager far too quickly.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

People tell me to just be myself like that would be a good thing.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

Every Reddit relationship post is like “My husband dropped a big piano on my head and when I emerged from the rubble my teeth had been replaced by the keys. Am I in the wrong?”

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Instagram:

I love tennis but never really been clear why they need a lifeguard.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I wish I got hotter every time a man made me mad.

Making waves on Telegram:

Hear me out. What if we don’t elect another president, and we all just promise to be really good?

Shared recently on WeChat:

Perks of being ugly: phone battery lasts longer.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Anyone who thinks office jobs are harmless has never cut their finger on paper.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Going out to eat and shopping by yourself is actually one of the most peaceful and therapeutic things ever.

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Activity Log ✨

Monday again. I just knew this would happen.

Choosing to ignore my strangely symbolic dream because I have a lot going on right now already.

Statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarfs aren’t happy.

I may not understand women, but cheeseburgers have never sent me mixed signals, and for that they’ll always have my heart.

To the tune of ‘Everybody Dance Now’: Himalayan Sea Salt

Does everyone have that one colleague at work who puts you in a bad mood just by looking at them?

I love how spring sprung and then disappeared again.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

I’m actually not funny. I’m just really mean and people think I’m joking.

Flat earth is too mainstream, hollow earth is where it’s at.

I’m professionally employed and personally unhinged. Balance.

No crypto for me, thanks, at least not until I figure out how dollars work.

If you’re looking for another bad decision, I’m here.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

You know who else works in mysterious ways? Me.

There aren’t any emojis that really express any meaningful sort of anguish.

I am both dumber and smarter than you think. Do not estimate me.

Fall fashion: where we all transform into stylish, toasty marshmallows!

Corporate life requires an ass-licking skill set I simply wasn’t born with.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

If history repeats itself, I’m getting a pet dinosaur.

Soup is great for when you’re hungry but want to still feel hungry afterward.

Why is Saturday over in 7 minutes and Sunday in 4 minutes, but Monday is 84 months long?

Why is sugar SO addictive, and broccoli is just like, “I’ll be here when you need me”

It’s amazing to think that a Penguin wrote all of those classic books.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

“You are what you eat”. I don’t remember eating a huge disappointment.

Grandmas be like: Imma stay for a few days and reset your children back to factory settings.

Put my height in bio. Hope it lands me a girlfriend.

Telling the cop I’ll give him his nose back if he lowers his firearm.

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Monday again. I just knew this would happen.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Choosing to ignore my strangely symbolic dream because I have a lot going on right now already.

Statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarfs aren’t happy.

I may not understand women, but cheeseburgers have never sent me mixed signals, and for that they’ll always have my heart.

To the tune of ‘Everybody Dance Now’: Himalayan Sea Salt

Does everyone have that one colleague at work who puts you in a bad mood just by looking at them?

I love how spring sprung and then disappeared again.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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