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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

Jesus, I need money to organize your birthday.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

If you finish every sentence with “as the prophecy foretold”, your coworkers will leave you alone.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

“You’re crazy.” God forbid I keep my family traits alive.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has copied:

Therapists probably have to struggle so hard not to ask to see pictures of the people their clients are obsessing over.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has viewed:

I just want someone who will treat me like a lady and hold the refrigerator door open for me.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

What are y’all gonna do when those labubus come to life and start biting y’alls ankles?

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

My brain has too many tabs open and one of them is playing music I can’t find.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

It’s finally actually Saturday after just thinking it was Saturday every day for the last five days.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

Welcome to your 40s: that “teenager”over there is actually 27.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

A girl hating you is a million times better than her calling you a ‘nice guy’.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,757

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Telegram:

If you’re going to walk in my shoes, please also wear my FitBit.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Robert De Niro always looks like he just smelled a nasty fart.

Shared recently on X:

Al guys are like, “We can’t use it to cure cancer, but we can suck all the joy and purpose out of life so that dying isn’t sad.”

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Everyone becomes a robo-dancer when the motion sensor faucet isn’t working.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Went on a date with a guy who didn’t ask me any questions about myself, so it’s on him when he finds out about my husband.

Trending via Snapchat:

Come on, karma, do your job.

Making waves on Discord:

Do y’all watch the results come or do you go to bed and wait to see what Democracy Claus left you in the morning?

Breaking via WhatsApp:

If anyone wants to watch the Super Bowl on a large 8k TV, come on over to my place (and bring a large 8k TV).

Seen just now on Instagram:

Dear LOL, thanks for being there when I have nothing else to say.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Getting accused of using AI when you didn’t is like this century’s version of a witch allegation.

My life would be pointless without cheese. Or as the famous song goes: “Ain’t no sunshine when cheese gone!”

Playful quote about life and cheese, blending humor with musical parody.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Life without cheese? That's a recipe for disaster! 🧀🎶 Who needs sunshine when you've got a gooey, melty grilled cheese to brighten your day? Keep the cheese coming and let the good times roll! 😄🧀 #CheeseIsLife"

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Keep the laugh going 😂

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Social Media Stars ⭐

14 shares on Messenger this month:

The whole “read before you go to bed to get sleepy” thing does not apply to me because I will be up till 5 a.m. if the book is worth it.

17 shares on Threads this month:

If paying a cashier a living wage will make prices go up, why doesn’t replacing cashiers with self-checkouts make prices go down?

55 shares on Twitch this month:

I love when lashes make me look evil.

40 shares on Discord this month:

I postpone certain outfits until I get a certain hairstyle because, yes, it’s that deep.

97 shares on YouTube this month:

Children will see a neatly hanging dish towel and be like oh hell no.

21 shares on Pinterest this month:

The haters said I couldn’t do it. And the haters? They were right. They were correct. They even nailed the small details, frankly it’s amazing.

24 shares on Discord this month:

Before you try to save someone, make sure you’re not interrupting their karma.

68 shares on Instagram this month:

Seeking a date so intense even the candles are sweating.

72 shares on Telegram this month:

I’ve been blocked by better.

26 shares on Slack this month:

I went from dancing with myself in the 80s to talking to myself now.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

17 folks are currently checking 👀

People call me a “Trekkie,” but I’m not. I’ve only seen Star Wars a couple of times.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

“I’m tired of being forced to eat microplastics. I’m ready for big plastics now.”

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I love hard, but I stupid harder.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I never forget a face, but in your case, I’ll be glad to make an exception.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I was going to learn to play the violin, but it was too much of a commitment. I wanted something with no strings attached.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s important to listen to both sides of the debate because you need to hear both the reality of the situation and also the dumbest thing anyone’s ever said.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

For the amount of meat you get out of clam, I feel like we could just leave them alone.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes life is “Eat, pray, love,” and sometimes it’s “Scroll, snack, overthink.”

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Before we become friends, could you please sign this NDA.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

The worst part about borrowing money is having to pay it back or move to a new city.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,592

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

Imagine working at Pornhub. At like the corporate office as a developer or whatever. White collar. That’s gotta be a weird job. Working there has gotta be bloody weird.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has copied:

The folks who write fragrance commercials must be like “I had the weirdest dream, Imma put it on TV.”

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

I recently saw a documentary about dinosaurs. They simply ate everyone they didn’t like. I like that concept.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has bookmarked:

Take me back to the night we met so I can never give you a chance.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

“AI is coming for your jobs!” I’d like to see AI get absolutely no work done and then throw their coworker under the bus as soon as their boss asks about it.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

My bank account and I are no longer on speaking terms.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has copied:

You wear a white shirt and all of a sudden everybody wants to go eat spaghetti.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

Gang members are so lucky to have something to do with their hands in photos.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

I can be social. Today I meowed at my cat and he meowed back.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

I’ve jogged with my jogging pants about as often as I’ve rolled through the kitchen with kitchen roll.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Discord:

Whoever first said, “It gets to a point,” was definitely at that point, and I feel them deeply.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

lol is punctuation and LOL is laugh out loud.

Going viral on Instagram:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to skirt the issue.

Shared recently on Messenger:

“Twister 3” should be told from a cow’s POV.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I want a restraining order on everyone who doesn’t wear deodorant.

Going viral on Discord:

Hey, sorry I acted weird the other day. I was trying so hard to act normal that it backfired.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

I’m glad nobody can see the face I make when I’ve just started the washing machine and then spot a sock on the floor.

Just landed via Slack:

Plot twist: the universe is waiting for you to give it a sign.

Freshly posted on Slack:

…and so ends another week of me not becoming unexpectedly rich.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

There’s an epidemic of people just staring at their phones in their parked cars.

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