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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ท has downloaded:

My son just turned an everything bagel into an everywhere bagel.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ซ has viewed:

Hold on, I just need to take off my glasses and put my face in my hands about it first.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ช๐Ÿ‡ช has copied:

Anything is an appetizer if you eat more food after.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ฎ has shared:

Life begins when you can afford it.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ผ has copied:

I just saw someone on TikTok say that the reason the world didnโ€™t end in 2012 is because Psy turned the Honmoon gold with Gangnam Style.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ณ has copied:

“Who does she think she is?” Well, it appears she is someone living her life unconcerned with who you think she is.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ด has shared:

Restaurant toilets are dangerous! So many of my dates have gone to use them and vanished.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ผ has bookmarked:

Them: Money doesn’t bring happiness. Me: Pass the money over here, I like to be sad.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has shared:

I love saying “why would I lie” when I’m lying.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ง has bookmarked:

I have noticed something quite worrying: after I buy more things I have less money.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

831 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,993

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,993

Updated

4 hours ago

Users Online

3,429

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Just landed via Twitch:

If you like pointing out beautiful scenery to three people who are on their phones, a family road trip is for you.

Reported on YouTube:

If you watch soccer backwards, it’s about 11 sad and 11 happy men who nag each other until they get along eventually.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

I’ve started ripping my shirt in half like Hulk Hogan when I mean business. Long story short, I’m looking for a new job.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I love ordering things online because when they arrive it’s like a present from me to me.

Going viral on Instagram:

Trying to carry a pet to bed is like moving a dense liquid thatโ€™s annoyed by you.

Going viral on WeChat:

Hereโ€™s to a new year of making the same old mistakes, but with far more enthusiasm.

Shared recently on X:

Breaking up is fine, but logging me out of your Netflix is crazy.

Live now on Twitch:

Sorry, I can’t today, I have to rot in bed and squander my potential.

Freshly posted on X:

Jesus died for your sins. If you donโ€™t sin then he died for nothing!

Spotted on Instagram:

Itโ€™s important to get out of the house every once in a while to get excited about going home.

Nowadays, people no longer look for a needle in a haystack, but for errors in a spreadsheet.

Nowadays, people no longer look for a needle in a haystack, but for errors in a spreadsheet.
Download image โ†“

Commentary:
In this digital age, the quest for perfection has shifted from the dusty haystacks to the daunting spreadsheets! ๐Ÿง๐Ÿ’ป Good luck finding that elusive needle of accuracy among the cells and formulas! #SpreadsheetStruggles

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Welcome to Wordgag! ๐Ÿ˜‰โœŒ๏ธ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’ฅ

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Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

831 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,993

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,993

Updated

4 hours ago

Users Online

3,433

Funny Quotes of the Month ๐Ÿš€

Funny Quotes of the Year โญ

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ฌ has bookmarked:

Me, when someone’s obsessed with me: Yikes! Me, when someone’s not obsessed with me: WTF?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡น has bookmarked:

The Recipe for Disaster in me, recognizes the Appetite for Destruction in you.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ณ has copied:

People will be like โ€œthere is no right or wrong way to do itโ€ until you do it the wrong way.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฟ has viewed:

Got a scam email full of mistakes like theyโ€™re not even trying. It wonโ€™t be long before AI takes their jobs.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡จ has bookmarked:

I wanna be crazy rich. I’m already crazy, so I’m half way there.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ has downloaded:

The problem with rich people is that I am not one.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡ผ has viewed:

I have the sex drive of a potato.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has bookmarked:

Welcome to Twitter, where everyone is an expert on everything.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ญ has copied:

If I let you into my life, I am either emotionally invested or you are a grilled cheese sandwich.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ธ has bookmarked:

Just asked this girl Hannah how she spells her name, and she just said, “Two of everything, darling.” Iconic!

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Just shared via X:

Death doesn’t scare me, but a group of dogs fighting while I’m walking alone on the street does.

Spotted on Instagram:

I’m super lazy today. It’s like normal lazy but I’m wearing a cape.

Reported on Messenger:

We get it, comma, you went to Oxford.

Trending via Messenger:

Liking a post I don’t understand just to impress the algorithm.

Spotted on X:

Companies post open positions online and then ask you why you applied to them.

Shared recently on Discord:

Surely, this is the hangover that will teach me my lesson.

Live now on Pinterest:

Nothing prepared me for the part of adulthood where you look like a baby deer learning to walk every time you get out of bed in the morning.

Just shared via Threads:

Me driving at night: I hope this is the road!

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Much like lasagna, Iโ€™m just held together by cheese at this point.

Breaking via Snapchat:

Anyone know how to create an Outlook rule that sends every email to junk, deletes it, blocks the sender, and sets my laptop on fire?

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ยฉ 2025. All fights retarded. ๐Ÿคช

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