Oh, you’re in a situationship? Are you the one with commitment issues or the one with low self-worth?

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

Set my sex robot to boyfriend mode and now it’s liking other girls’ pictures on Insta.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

No dating apps this year. Just going to walk around and smile at people and send an occasional unhinged DM.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

Sex is great, but have you ever started slowly picking up speed after sitting in a traffic jam?

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

Autocorrect is like a tiny person inside your phone that sometimes gets drunk and says the dumbest things.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

My retirement plan is recording a hit Christmas song. I just need to learn how to sing and write music.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has copied:

Think about how many more lovers you’d have if a cross country high-speed rail existed. That’s what they are taking away from you.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has bookmarked:

I don’t need all of these heat advisory warnings on my phone. I’ve been outside. I have skin. I know.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

Doesn’t matter if the chicken or the egg came first. Still a weird thing to just appear.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

We need a true crime show called Downtown Stabby.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

I bet aliens lock their door when they go past earth.