Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

My problem areas are my upper arms and earth.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has bookmarked:

Adulting looked way more affordable in the 90’s. I feel scammed.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

So I got a call from a telemarketer, and he said he couldn’t understand me. I told him, “Press 1 for English.”

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

Water is a drink whose flavor is its temperature.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has copied:

Thinking about ignoring daily mess by creating new holiday decor mess.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

Donuts are beautiful creatures, and they deserve their own week on the nature channels.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

I need a new hobby that costs zero dollars and takes up 100% of my free time. So far, all I’ve come up with is mowing the lawn.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

Europeans read a lot because their television shows suck.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

Don’t believe in yourself, you can’t do it.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has downloaded:

AI could never replace me, you can’t put this much self-loathing into a machine.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Dec 22, 2025

3,734

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WeChat:

I love being a pretty woman because it widens the threshold for cringe-worthy things I can say.

Spotted on Slack:

One of the best examples of someone posing a question that they already know the answer to is the WeightWatchers website asking me if I accept cookies.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Going out to eat and shopping by yourself is actually one of the most peaceful and therapeutic things ever.

Trending via Facebook:

Remember when you could lay in one position for hours, now you have to rotate like a rotisserie chicken every 15 minutes or a hip hurts.

Making waves on Messenger:

Once I get my UFO, don’t be asking me for rides.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

The first 120 hours after the weekend are always the worst.

Breaking via TikTok:

Turning regret into ulcers since the day I was born.

Going viral on Twitch:

Cats must think we’re so weird for constantly harvesting their poop.

Just shared via Facebook:

Kids today have it much easier. When I was growing up and something bad happened, we had to go outside and spread our misinformation in person.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Just found out that rock bottom has a basement.

Oh, you’re in a situationship? Are you the one with commitment issues or the one with low self-worth?

2 months ago

0

Oh, you’re in a situationship? Are you the one with commitment issues or the one with low self-worth?

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic dilemma of the modern dating world! 🤔 Who knew 'situationships' could be so complex? Are you playing the commitment dodgeball or rocking the low self-worth tango? Either way, it takes two to tango in the land of blurred lines! 💃🕺"

commitment, commitment issue, dating, humor, issue, issues, love, low, oh, relationship, sarcasm, self-worth, situationship

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Old people get so mad when you’re young and tired.

0

1 month ago

anger, differences, generational, generational differences, humor, mad, old, old person, people, person, tired, young
I’m so good at sleeping that I can do it with my eyes closed.

0

1 month ago

closed, eye, good, humor, rest, skill, sleeping, talent
I love posting my thoughts on the internet. Now they’re your problem.

0

5 months ago

communication, humor, i, internet, love, media, posting, problem, sharing, social, social media, thought, thoughts
Thank you for being friends with me. Baffling decision, but thank you.

0

2 months ago

appreciation, baffling, being, decision, friend, friends, humor, me, relationships, thank, thank you
How are they running out of oxygen if they’re breathing it right back into the submarine?

0

2 months ago

back, breathing, confusion, humor, logic, oxygen, right, running, submarine
Most people prefer lies. The truth just hits them like a WiFi outage, and then they just stand there, confused and buffering.

0

1 month ago

buffering, confused, confusion, humor, just, lie, most, outage, people, reality, stand, technology, truth, wifi

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

46 shares on Twitch this month:

When someone asks why you don’t have kids just say “dingoes”.

69 shares on Pinterest this month:

The only recipes they have online are where I’m the one who’s supposed to buy all this stuff and then make it. That’s not what I’m looking for.

46 shares on Reddit this month:

Do you ever wish you could just walk away mid-conversation when you’re bored?

72 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’m in my 20s, but somehow I’m 16 and also 55 at the same time.

73 shares on TikTok this month:

Monday again. I just knew this would happen.

98 shares on Snapchat this month:

When people say something is cray-cray it makes me wanna vom-vom.

35 shares on Slack this month:

I don’t need coffee, misanthropy fuels me.

13 shares on Snapchat this month:

Why go to the art museum when I can just stare at you?

29 shares on Telegram this month:

I was telling my sister that I’ve been going to the gym recently, and my nephew said, “You should go inside when you get there,” and I don’t think I’ll ever recover from that.

12 shares on Slack this month:

I used to think I was indecisive, but I’m not so sure anymore.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I taped a picture of my paycheck on my front door to keep all the solicitors away.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

The only thing I worry about when I’m in the restroom is if people are washing their hands or not.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Socialism isn’t wrong because it has compassion. It’s wrong because it doesn’t work.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

When I grow up, I’d like to be a retired lottery winner.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Living la vida taco!

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Live, laugh, lie to the doctor about how many drinks you have per week.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Thank you all for attending my final rose ceremony. There will be no roses.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Did you get that psychic damage I sent you?

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I need a vacation, but the kind where everyone else leaves, and I have my house to myself for a few days.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth. Then it becomes a soap opera.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

3,684

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

If Spotify has taught me anything, it’s that I don’t know the correct lyrics to any of my favorite songs.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

I like riding by myself so I can replay 1 song 111 times with no complaints.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

People always say, “There’s plenty of fish in the sea” … yeah, but I’ve got my eye fixed on that specific, emotionally distant salmon who has commitment issues.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

Discord is only good for calling friends on the computer. Please do not waste your time getting caught up in random servers.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

I may be a chaotic mess, but then so is quantum physics.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

Girlhood is sitting down in a boiling hot shower instead of dealing with life.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

Santa: “Don’t leave me milk. Leave me whiskey.”

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

If you’re a guy and you’re struggling right now, just remember nobody cares, and it does get worse.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

You’re not a real baddie until a man has tried to forbid you from posting on social media.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

Handing over my ID at the post office. The clerk said, “You’ve aged quite a bit since this photo was taken.” I said, “Yes, I had it taken just before I joined this queue.”

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Reddit:

Whoever said “team work makes the dream work” needs to explain that to my many personalities.

Broadcasted on Threads:

Life sucks a lot less when your feet are in a creek, and you forgot your phone in the truck.

Spotted on Snapchat:

No one talks about the horrific event of meeting someone who is exactly your type.

Going viral on WeChat:

Every single morning, I have to get out of bed and do things, and it’s bullshit.

Making waves on Telegram:

“That’s an interesting take,” I say, not listening.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Socks try to be monogamous, but most end up either single or having multiple different partners.

Freshly posted on X:

Interrupt my sleep and I’ll interrupt your breathing.

Just landed via WeChat:

A real smart TV would increase the volume when you start eating chips.

Just landed via YouTube:

Can you imagine being a 7th grade girl and being able to see your crush’s bedroom during Zoom math class.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

God forbid a girl wanna kiss and be kissed.

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴