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Commentary:
"Another year wiser? 🎂 Nah! Just one year closer to perfecting the art of adulting… or not! 🙃 Age is just a number, maturity is optional! 😜🎉"

adulthood, age, birthday, growing, growing up, humor, life, older, reflection, still, today, year

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43 shares on Messenger this month:

I feel sorry for Netflix era kids. They will never know the high stakes adrenaline of running away in an ad break, with the beckoning call of a sibling screaming “It’s ON!” to send you hurdling over furniture to get back in time.

89 shares on Pinterest this month:

I hate Valentine’s Day but I do enjoy infant archery.

87 shares on Twitch this month:

Women are obsessed with Love Island, but when me and my boys do it in real life, we’re disgusting cheating dogs?

34 shares on Messenger this month:

“I should’ve peed before I left,” will be my epitaph.

26 shares on X this month:

The divorce rate among my socks is astonishing.

22 shares on Instagram this month:

First date idea: you bring me coffee in bed, and we snuggle all morning.

90 shares on Threads this month:

I hate when people ask me what I meant by something. Listen, I have no idea. I’m as confused here as you are. We’re both learning what I’m about to say at the exact same time.

56 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Revenge? No. I just post hot selfies and let the algorithm do God’s work.

81 shares on WhatsApp this month:

This call, should’ve been a message in a bottle I never found.

88 shares on Discord this month:

Everytime I spend $20 I think this is fine because I won’t do it again. And then would you believe.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

It’s strange that watching paint dry is considered boring but going to an art gallery is considered interesting. That’s just watching paint that’s already dry.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has downloaded:

No one has ever believed in me more than this waitress, who brought me buffalo wings and a single wet nap.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

This gum has my stomach convinced food is coming.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

I tried to embrace my flaws. They filed a restraining order.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

My boss said he likes how I remain so calm under pressure. Can’t tell him it’s because I don’t give a shit.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

You know what goes great with helping your kid with math homework? Vodka!

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

Girlhood is sitting down in a boiling hot shower instead of dealing with life.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has copied:

If I go quiet, it’s because I am plotting my escape or your demise.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

Party rock is in the mouse tonighttt, piece of cheese I’m gonna take a big biteee.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has viewed:

Just spoke to my wife while the internet was down. She seems nice. She’s a nurse apparently.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Technically, all the money I have ever spent on food has been flushed down the toilet.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Girl math is deactivating social media accounts to avoid only one person.

Just shared via Twitch:

I lost my appetite for doing work. If you find it, you can keep it.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Biblical loophole: It’s not premarital sex if you never intend to get married.

Trending via Messenger:

Miso soup is such a silly name, like “Yes, you so soup.”

Going bananas on WeChat:

The elderberry is the wisest and most knowledgeable of all the berries.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I want a hot body, but I also want hot wings.

Spotted on Pinterest:

“It can’t get any worse than this”, I lie to myself knowing it will absolutely get worse.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

“We’re the only species that drinks milk after infancy, dairy is bad for you!” We’re also the only species that drinks peach mango pineapple spirulina kale smoothies, Karen. Let me eat my cheese in peace.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Getting so tangled in the sex shop bead curtain that they have to put me down like a horse with a broken leg.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

One year older today, and still no closer to growing up.

Having little kids is great because I love spending hundreds of dollars each week to feed my floor and my trash can.

I love it when my dog suddenly gets up and goes to another part of the house. Did you just remember you left the stove on or something?

I hate small cars that disguise themselves as free parking spaces and drop their masks as soon as you pull up in front of them.

I was dismayed to hear the story of Rumpelstiltskin. I had no idea he was like that outside of work.

When I say I like when older men tell me what to do, I am talking about Yoda and his teachings.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

One year older today, and still no closer to growing up.

Keep the laugh going 😂

You’re in his DMs, so am I, but I am way funnier.

Having little kids is great because I love spending hundreds of dollars each week to feed my floor and my trash can.

I love it when my dog suddenly gets up and goes to another part of the house. Did you just remember you left the stove on or something?

I hate small cars that disguise themselves as free parking spaces and drop their masks as soon as you pull up in front of them.

I was dismayed to hear the story of Rumpelstiltskin. I had no idea he was like that outside of work.

When I say I like when older men tell me what to do, I am talking about Yoda and his teachings.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨