Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

There are advantages to living alone: everything always stays where you put it. There are disadvantages to living alone: everything always stays where you put it.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has copied:

Where do I see myself in 5 years? I don’t even know where I am right now.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

Socialism isn’t wrong because it has compassion. It’s wrong because it doesn’t work.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

I’m basically the human version of tangled up Christmas lights.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

I come from a long line of people with something wrong with them.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

My wife just pulled me into the other room, and I thought she wanted to have a serious talk, but she just wanted to give me M&M’s without the kids seeing.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has copied:

Me: Do you have the movie I want to watch? Netflix: No, but we have hundreds of movies that you don’t want to watch!

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

“You have reached your monthly article limit,” – a website you’ve never accessed before today.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

I think every app should, by law, let you deactivate all of its short-form video content.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

“I’m gonna sneak past you.” No you’re not. You’ve alerted me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

508 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,101

Funny Quotes Topics

17,252

Funny Quotes Images

15,101

Updated

Dec 23, 2025

Users Online

3,630

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Reddit:

Why do birds love going apeshit first thing in the morning?

Going bananas on Discord:

l identify as a Christmas tree. Lit on the outside, dead on the inside.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Had a fight with an erection this morning. Beat it single-handed.

Trending via WeChat:

All the wrong decisions in this country are based on the fact that my balcony faces out the back and so I can’t speak to the people.

Freshly posted on X:

He died doing what he loved: trying to find out if gang members are ticklish.

Going viral on Threads:

I’m homeless. Minus the ‘m’.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Not photogenic, but I probably look soooo good as a distant memory.

Making waves on Snapchat:

I saw The Blair Witch Project way too young and it made me afraid of projects.

Going viral on Telegram:

You did all that terrible driving just to end up right next to me at the stop light.

Just landed via Twitch:

All we needed to be happy in the 90s was music and cigarettes.

More funny quotes 👇

No, don’t worry about him, babe. That’s just my soulmate.

0

5 months ago

babe, humor, joke, just, love, partner, relationship, soulmate, worry

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

72 shares on Slack this month:

The toughest part of being a vegan is keeping it to yourself.

59 shares on Discord this month:

Parent hack: Shut your child’s bedroom door to make your house cleaner.

67 shares on Reddit this month:

1pm, the perfect time to start doing the work I woke up early to get a jump on.

59 shares on Reddit this month:

Me: I’m an introvert. Vodka: No, you’re not.

86 shares on TikTok this month:

I love when my husband says, “correct me if I’m wrong,” like I would pass up that opportunity.

62 shares on Twitch this month:

My therapist said I should face my fears. So I turned my phone back on.

33 shares on Reddit this month:

Handing the bus driver a $50 bill and telling him “Just drive”.

45 shares on Instagram this month:

Love when plans get canceled. It’s like getting a snow day as an adult.

24 shares on X this month:

If Shakespeare were being born today, he’d be “Shaxxespyr.”

61 shares on Reddit this month:

Why is sleeping at night so hard, but sleeping in the morning is like drifting away on a soft, fluffy cloud while Adele sings you a lullaby?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

The inventor of archery: Man, I really wanna stab that guy over there.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

I just came across my wife’s Tinder profile and I’m so angry about her lies. She is not “fun to be around”.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has downloaded:

It’s our first time on Earth, so why are you a life coach?

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

Isolation, the most goated coping mechanism. I love talking to no one and losing my mind alone.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has viewed:

My only knowledge of animals is that turtles like pizza and cats like lasagna.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has viewed:

I’m really into writing short fiction, mainly to-do lists.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

When I die I want people to say “Hmm, I didn’t know you could die like that.”

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

Welcome to your late 40s! From now on you will no longer be in “good health” but in “good health for your age”.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has downloaded:

They always say, there is someone for everyone… unfortunately, the person for me is a therapist.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Snapchat:

After a lot of experience, I can conclude that one can never actually cross “washing dishes” off the to-do list.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Someone said I should think before I speak and I said “eww what a horrible way to live”

Trending via Instagram:

This can’t be the same brain I was using to read 750-page novels in 3 days during middle school.

Live now on Threads:

You don’t even have to date, by the way. You can just take a break from love and then randomly meet the actual love of your life somewhere you weren’t even supposed to be.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Why’d they call it a fly swatter and not a splatula?

Just shared via Pinterest:

Shoutout to the friends that still like me. All two of you.

Just shared via Telegram:

My toxic trait is thinking I can nap, then waking up 3 hours later in a parallel universe where I missed everything.

Spotted on WeChat:

Plot Twist: Your taxes cheated on you.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Every man learns for himself the uselessness of owning an iPad.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Self-help books are brain rot. Return to fiction.

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

No, don’t worry about him, babe. That’s just my soulmate.

Social Media Stars ⭐

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