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Commentary:
"Ah, the inventor of archery had quite the direct approach to conflict resolution! 🏹😄 Seems like 'stabbing' was the original inspiration for the bow and arrow! 🎯😆"

aggression, archery, conflict, guy, humor, i, inventor, irony, joke, man, over, stab

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I feel like the person who named pink eye also named orange juice.

0

2 months ago

comparison, eye, feel, funny comparison, humor, i, irony, juice, naming, orange, orange juice, person, pink, pink eye
If it weren’t for the last minute, I’d never do anything.

0

5 months ago

anything, deadline, humor, ID, last, last minute, minute, motivation, never, procrastination, productivity
It’s a good thing when your therapist sits down with a bucket of popcorn, right?

0

2 months ago

amusing, entertainment, good, health, humor, mental, mental health, popcorn, right, therapist, therapy, thing
When you report something to IT and then hear: “Oh! Interesting. We’ve never seen that before.” Is that good or bad?

0

2 months ago

bad, before, good, hear, humor, interesting, IT, never, never seen, oh, report, seen, something, technology, troubleshooting
Do goalies ever get lonely during a game?

0

2 months ago

ever, game, goalie, humor, lonely, question, sports
I hate when people can’t let go of the past. Debt collectors are the worst.

0

2 months ago

collector, debt, hate, humor, i, let, past, people, sarcasm, worst

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

76 shares on Facebook this month:

Nothing is impossible, except for my daughter returning home with the hat and gloves she wore to school this morning.

78 shares on WhatsApp this month:

People said follow your dreams, so I went back to bed.

81 shares on Snapchat this month:

Filling my PEZ dispenser with Ibuprofen for whimsical pain relief.

32 shares on Reddit this month:

I’m too lazy to be a superhero. If I had laser eyes, I’d probably just use them to heat soup or something.

27 shares on Telegram this month:

Why are moths always out at night when they like light so much? Wait til y’all find out about the sun.

40 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Half of Twitter is horny, half is depressed, and the other half don’t know how to do math.

51 shares on Pinterest this month:

Full-time employment will have you making lists of thoughts to think.

45 shares on YouTube this month:

I was blinded by a goddamn deer with a shiny red nose… No, officer, I haven’t been drinking.

13 shares on YouTube this month:

This is my emotional support online shopping cart.

12 shares on TikTok this month:

We don’t make people walk the plank like we used to.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇧 has copied:

Please don’t match my crazy. One of us has to be rational here, and it’s definitely not going to be me.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

Just once I’d like to buy a house plant that didn’t have the lifespan of a soap bubble.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

TikTok? I still call it a watch.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

The way people who are really into each other look moments before kissing is so hot. It’s like seeing a glimpse of cannibalism.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

Sorry, boss, I can’t come in to work today, I’m gonna be playing outside.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

Farts are just the ghosts of the things we eat.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

I’m the type of husband that helps his wife look for her missing chocolate that I ate.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

Printers are definitely the moody teenagers of the tech world.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has shared:

My son got braces today. Yay, he’s not going to be a teenage dad.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has bookmarked:

Roses are red. Let’s get some fresh air. Make love in the moonlight. Have a pregnancy scare.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on X:

Me going to work because I’m too honest to scam people, too shy to be an influencer, too good for a sugar daddy, and too dumb for crypto.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I’m not being smart, I’m just a skilled trained professional in pointing out the obvious.

Trending via Discord:

No matter how old you are, an empty Christmas wrapping tube is still a fun thing to bonk someone over the head with.

Going viral on Discord:

“Nothing burger” is such a funny phrase. Americans when nothing: so imagine a burger.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Nothing hurts more than someone not getting your joke.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Back in the day, you used to have to listen to records backwards to discover conspiracy theories.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Ancestors survived five mass extinctions on earth for me to be killed by a house cat I was trying to put a Christmas sweater on.

Spotted on Telegram:

Babe, are you OK? You’ve barely fulfilled the prophecy.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Hey! Sorry I missed your text, I am processing a non-stop 24/7 onslaught of information with a brain designed to eat berries in a cave.

Going viral on Threads:

I just feel like we shouldn’t have a new year until we get this one right.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

The inventor of archery: Man, I really wanna stab that guy over there.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I feel like the person who named pink eye also named orange juice.

If it weren’t for the last minute, I’d never do anything.

It’s a good thing when your therapist sits down with a bucket of popcorn, right?

When you report something to IT and then hear: “Oh! Interesting. We’ve never seen that before.” Is that good or bad?

Do goalies ever get lonely during a game?

I hate when people can’t let go of the past. Debt collectors are the worst.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨