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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

I hope this email blows your head smoove off.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

I like winter because I fundamentally understand I deserve to suffer.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

In the baking aisle, booing everyone buying imitation vanilla extract.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

Eating watermelon and minding my own business.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

Current state of politics: The circus is on fire but the monkey is fine.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

A lobotomy and a forehead kiss would fix everything.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

Vegans will look you dead in the eye and tell you cauliflower tastes like ribs.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

Printers are definitely the moody teenagers of the tech world.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

This year should be named “things I never thought could happen”.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

Y’all can keep the nonchalant ones — I want mine weak in the knees about me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

297 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,566

Funny Quotes Topics

17,623

Funny Quotes Images

15,566

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,473

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Telegram:

Sorry, I can’t talk right now. The seam of my sock feels weird.

Going bananas on Facebook:

Accordion to current studies, 90% of you did not realize that this sentence started with a musical instrument.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

In England “booster shot” is spelled “borchestershire shot”.

Just landed via Snapchat:

I used to be sad about the climate apocalypse, but I went on a few dates and, honestly, I’m ready now.

Going bananas on TikTok:

Eat whatever you want. If someone calls you fat, eat them too.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Think like a crazy person, and then you’ll understand.

Live now on YouTube:

Sorry it took so long to text you back; my social bandwidth was buffering.

Freshly posted on Threads:

I’ve never seen a Cybertruck with anyone in the passenger seat.

Going viral on Facebook:

The number of times I stand in a room, staring because I forgot why I walked in there, is embarrassingly high.

Trending via YouTube:

For the first time in history, you can simply post “He’s an idiot” and 90% of the world will know whom you’re talking about.

What song lyric resonates with you the most? Mine is “we’re tiny, we’re toony, we’re all a little loony”

What song lyric resonates with you the most? Mine is “we’re tiny, we’re toony, we’re all a little loony”
Download image ↓

Commentary:
Ah, a classic choice! Those Animaniacs always knew how to put a quirky spin on things. 🎶 Keep embracing your inner loony tune! Who says being a little off-kilter is a bad thing? 😉

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

75 shares on Slack this month:

A collective orgasm would fix the world.

75 shares on Snapchat this month:

The answer is a cabin in the woods, by the way.

63 shares on X this month:

It’s really sad that April Fools is the only day people are appropriately skeptical of stuff they read on the internet.

56 shares on Discord this month:

I’m gonna get my vasectomy done at Home Depot like a real man.

87 shares on Snapchat this month:

I think we all know who to blame for the generation of parents who put too many Ys in their kids’ names. Lynyrd Skynyrd.

67 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Someone needs to invent a theater seat that forcefully ejects you through the roof if you take your phone out during a movie.

30 shares on Twitch this month:

Everyone tells me “take care”, but no one tells me why.

47 shares on Pinterest this month:

Mail is crazy because it’s like 99 pieces of straight up garbage and 1 that if you don’t reply to you’re going to jail.

70 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Blood pressure too high to chase these hoes.

70 shares on Slack this month:

Avoid calls from pesky bill collectors by not paying your phone bill.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

23 folks are currently checking 👀

A marriage is about solving problems together, you know, those problems you wouldn’t have if you were single.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I really can’t wait until it all works out.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Having a girlfriend is insane because you can literally text them, and they will respond.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

This weekend was so busy, I hardly had time to sit around in my pajamas and doom scroll.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Some Uber rides in NYC are the same price as a JetBlue flight to Miami.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Once I shot a man with a paintball gun, just to watch him dye.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

By day I am just a regular loser, by night I am the same loser only it’s nighttime.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Stop blaming everyone for all of your problems. Pick one person you hate, and blame them for everything.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing humbles you faster than your phone slipping out of your hand and hitting your face.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Candy companies will look you straight in the eye and lie about how they know what a banana tastes like.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

297 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,566

Funny Quotes Topics

17,623

Funny Quotes Images

15,566

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,631

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

What base is it when he says, “I know you need it badly,” but he’s talking about sleep?

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

Today, I’m going to give it my almost.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

Roses are red, I’m staying in bed. I’ve made no plans, besides pretending I’m dead.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

A dating app for people who are way too into cookies, called Crumble.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

Some people buy shoes to feel alive. I buy boarding passes.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

Being complimented by a girl in public is like getting kissed by an angel.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

You can either have a nice evening or you can help your child with their math homework. You can’t have both.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has downloaded:

Pizza rolls are comfort food because they look like little pillows.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has shared:

I don’t fight my demons anymore. We collaborate.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

I would prefer not to.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Snapchat:

Moms will vacuum the ceiling, alphabetize the spice rack, reorganize your socks, then say, “No one helps me around here!”

Just shared via Pinterest:

Despite removing all the stains, I still lost my job as a church window cleaner.

Making waves on Messenger:

Lou Read is the name of my favorite musician and also the book I keep in the toilet.

Seen just now on Reddit:

I don’t have a welcome mat at my front door because I’m not a liar.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Guy in front of me at the movies was reading the popcorn Wikipedia page while he was eating popcorn.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

I feel like an adult spelling bee would humble a lot of us.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Sex so good, my left hand is making my right hand a sandwich.

Live now on WeChat:

Sitting in an antique chair is weird, like this thing has seen so many butts.

Going viral on Reddit:

The secret to work life balance is generational wealth.

Just shared via Telegram:

Do you scroll through Netflix to find a good show for your dog to watch when you leave the house or are you normal?

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