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Commentary:
"When life hands you lemons, make sure they don't see it coming! Remember, it's all fun and games until someone gets lemon juice in their eye."

eye, humor, joke, lemon, life, prank, someone, squirt

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I always fear that one day I will enter my house and find a thief, knocked out unconscious by the things fallen on his head from some closet.

0

2 months ago

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Hot singles over 40 in your area are curious what you use for joint pain and inflammation.

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2 months ago

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Not all people have bad neighbors. The ones next door have a great one.

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2 months ago

bad, door, great, humor, neighbor, neighbors, next, people
People at the library need to learn how to be quiet. Some of us are trying to beatbox over here.

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2 months ago

activity, beatbox, distraction, here, humor, learn, library, need, over, people, quiet, trying
Dear wallet, please get pregnant.

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4 hours ago

dear, financial, financial humor, humor, money, please, pregnant, wallet, wish
What’s a beginner hobby for someone just getting into being happy?

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2 months ago

beginner, beginner hobby, being, getting, getting started, happiness, happy, hobby, humor, just, question, self-improvement, someone, started

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

22 shares on Snapchat this month:

“You’re so understanding,” yeah, because I don’t want to go to prison for the rest of my life.

69 shares on Instagram this month:

I bet oiling and wrapping potatoes in aluminum foil feels so good for the potato.

34 shares on X this month:

I changed my password to ‘incorrect’ so whenever I forget it, the computer tells me it’s incorrect, and I’m like, ‘Wow, you didn’t have to be so rude about it.’

20 shares on Discord this month:

My parents often told me I would lose my own head if it wasn’t screwed on and now that I’m an adult, I want to know what tools I need to have it screwed off.

44 shares on Pinterest this month:

Bro, are you a black hole, because you suck energy and light?

63 shares on YouTube this month:

My favorite genre of tweet is conservative guy asking Grok, ‘Is this true?’ and then arguing with it when it doesn’t give him the answer he likes.

74 shares on Slack this month:

If you sweat while you eat, it should count as a workout.

95 shares on Telegram this month:

It is kind of inspiring that I messed up my life without drugs, gambling or a troubled youth. People really can do anything.

92 shares on Snapchat this month:

When I was a kid, no phones or tablets. We just read the cereal box at breakfast.

63 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I have one of those metal briefcases handcuffed to my wrist, and inside… my grandmother’s meatloaf recipe.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

Getting older is so fun. Your life goals slowly transition from things like ‘land a dream job’ to ‘successfully grow a cherry tomato.’

Someone from 🇨🇫 has shared:

If I’m wrongly accused of a crime, I’m going to prison. I’m way too introverted to have an alibi.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

Are you the sun? Because you need to stay about 92,960,000 miles away from me.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

I only have one wish in life… For all my dreams to come true.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

Relationship status: I love my bed.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

The real anti-aging regimen is retaining your childlike wonder and whimsy.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has downloaded:

Someone asked me if I had any hobbies and I panicked and said “lasagna”.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

You can’t spell disappointment without me.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has downloaded:

The more I insisted marshmallows were vegetables, the angrier my doctor got.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Snapchat:

Sorry I said your toddler should be in commercials for birth control.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

The elderberry is the wisest and most knowledgeable of all the berries.

Live now on WhatsApp:

The guy who drills the holes so you can assemble IKEA furniture is clearly having problems at home.

Seen just now on Messenger:

(lost in the labyrinth and I’m wearing a Fitbit) Nice, got my 10,000 steps.

Going viral on WeChat:

Went jogging and came back after five minutes because I forgot something. Forgot I’m out of shape.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Wake me when AI does housework.

Shared recently on Discord:

What career is most compatible with the unemployed lifestyle?

Breaking via Slack:

My friend and I had a running joke. She said, “Let’s do a marathon,” and then we both laughed.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

The older I get, the more I understand why people live in the woods and talk to squirrels.

Trending via WeChat:

The gap in my resume is because I was trying to reach enlightenment for 5 years.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I always fear that one day I will enter my house and find a thief, knocked out unconscious by the things fallen on his head from some closet.

Hot singles over 40 in your area are curious what you use for joint pain and inflammation.

Not all people have bad neighbors. The ones next door have a great one.

People at the library need to learn how to be quiet. Some of us are trying to beatbox over here.

Dear wallet, please get pregnant.

What’s a beginner hobby for someone just getting into being happy?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨