Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

I think the bowl of ice cream I ate earlier gave me a stomach ache, so I ate a another bowl to make sure.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has copied:

I’ll find a cell mate before I’ll ever find a soulmate.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

We keep a potato masher in a drawer because sometimes it’s fun not to be able to open that drawer.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

Having now listened to the entire song, I have to say there’s some obvious internal disagreement as to what the Hokey Pokey is all about.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

Why steal office supplies from work when you could take an extra-long bathroom break and steal company time instead?

Someone from 🇲🇽 has downloaded:

Coffee tastes so much better handed to me.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

Germany is now advising people to stock up on cheese and sausages. This is called the Wurst Käse scenario.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

Me passing someone: you slow mule! Me being passed: okay, speed racer!

Someone from 🇪🇨 has shared:

Remember when you could lay in one position for hours, now you have to rotate like a rotisserie chicken every 15 minutes or a hip hurts.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

Fun fact: sexual tension is more fun than the sex itself.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,715

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Sure the Lego botanical sets are great but dusting them is another story.

Making waves on Discord:

As a child, my family’s mealtime menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.

Going viral on Facebook:

I’m not saying I’m old. I’m just saying that my dinner time and bedtime are getting dangerously close to each other.

Just landed via X:

Instead of renting an apartment, I’m going to save up for a lighthouse and go insane in it.

Just shared via TikTok:

The best part about your kids being sick is you get to see exactly how shitty you’re going to feel in 48 hours.

Going bananas on Reddit:

I love making the whole conversation so awkward that the most anyone can say after is “so yeah…”

Just landed via Pinterest:

I’m perfectly approachable as long as you’re carrying a plate of nachos.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

The best part of the relationship is before you meet them, and you’re single.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

I was having a great Friday until I found out it was Thursday.

Going viral on Instagram:

My favorite thing to do at the gym is stay home and eat a piece of cake.

Work again? Really? Didn’t I just do that yesterday?

Humorous text expressing exhaustion with work, playful and relatable in tone.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
Ah, the eternal struggle between adulthood and the desire for infinite weekends 🤔🎤 "Work again? I believe we've had this conversation before… like, daily?" 😆 #AdultingFeels #MondayBlues

, , , , , , , , , ,

Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

83 shares on Snapchat this month:

How many sit-ups do I have to do before I get a six-pack? Please say 5.

65 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Going down a rabbit hole if anyone wants anything.

81 shares on Reddit this month:

I always thought that aunts had a lot of money. Until I became one myself.

55 shares on Messenger this month:

My wife is refusing to bring me a beer. That’s it, gonna text her and say “I cannot believe how lazy you are”.

25 shares on Instagram this month:

Girls who leave clothing reviews with their height, weight, and size ordered are going to heaven.

13 shares on Reddit this month:

My five-year plan only requires a few acts of God.

67 shares on Pinterest this month:

Grok just sounds like something that might try to eat me.

98 shares on YouTube this month:

I talk to one guy, and he wants to break my heart. I talk to five guys, and they all wanna take me seriously.

19 shares on YouTube this month:

Socialism isn’t wrong because it has compassion. It’s wrong because it doesn’t work.

80 shares on Threads this month:

I think I’ll just sit here and waste oxygen all day.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Nobody cleans better than someone who’s pissed off.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I can actually be quite charming if you would let me out of the guillotine.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

The problem is that younger me didn’t account for the fact that there’d be an older me.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry I’m late. My catapult malfunctioned.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Asking the waiter for her phone number and then texting her “can I have more coffee?” two minutes later.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s so hot out, I just hydroplaned off the toilet seat at work.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

New year; new me. Just kidding. I’m already awesome.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m full of rage, but in a very chill and nonchalant way.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Some days you’re the bat, some days you’re the ball.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not here to make friends, just noise.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,638

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇯 has downloaded:

Someone at work is gonna suggest you download Outlook and Teams on your phone, and it’s very important that you don’t listen to them.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has shared:

“NOT dishwasher safe!” You’ll be okay, buddy, just do your best in there.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

Blocking him isn’t enough. I need to watch his hairline recede.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

You can talk about any topic for 30 mins if you’re a confident liar.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

I appreciate the people that interact with me and I really appreciate the ones that don’t.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

I’ve calculated my December budget and realized I can only afford to pray.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has copied:

Today is the Mondayest Thursday that has ever been mistaken for a Friday in the history of Wednesdays.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

I bought a 12 year old whiskey. His parents are furious.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

Workplace Wrapped: you had 60k minutes of meetings this year that could’ve been an email.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has viewed:

I hate when the lotion bottle pump squirts the hardened remains of its mucus plug into the palm of your hand.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on LinkedIn:

My birth year getting a lil too far on those lil scroll lists. I don’t like that.

Spotted on TikTok:

I have a very particular set of useless skills.

Breaking via Messenger:

Your phone is a casino designed to steal your time.

Just shared via Facebook:

It’s so hot the chipmunks are using my bird bath as a hot tub and requesting mimosas and the brunch menu.

Just shared via YouTube:

Girls only want one thing, and it’s to be photographed candidly on 35mm film.

Just landed via TikTok:

I poked your tweet with a stick, hoping it would do something.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Inflation is actually a good thing, it means money is going viral.

Spotted on Threads:

Dating for love isn’t working. Now I’m dating to conduct psychological experiments and collect data.

Freshly posted on X:

I did not “try to rob a bank,” I just “aspired” to obtain more money.

Shared recently on Messenger:

I ordered a new umbrella on Amazon and had it delivered straight to the lost and found office to maximize efficiency.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴