Trendy Funny Quotes

  • The most I’ve ever spent on a bottle of wine is about 45 minutes.
  • Need to shave my legs again. Blow-drying takes far too long.
  • I don’t know which is worse, people stealing your jokes or people not stealing your jokes.
  • Since I tolerate gluten and lactose well, I can afford a few intolerances in the interpersonal area.
  • Hey beauty brands who make face creams: 30ml is only enough for an ant’s face.
  • I made a clone of myself to do the dishes, another to do the laundry, and another to do the cooking, but we’re all sitting on the couch watching TV.