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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

I’m 6 donuts away from being the elephant in the room.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

They should invent a way to delete other people’s posts.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

If you’re going to give me some food for thought, it had better be a pizza, or I’m out.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

Don’t understand why electricians aren’t called power rangers, but okay.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

I’m tired of things costing money.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

I’ve folded seven page corners of the book I’m reading. That’s 49 in dog ears.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

All dogs go to heaven, but I never see them in church.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

My taste in music ranges from “You’ve gotta listen to this” to “I know, please don’t judge me.”

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

People that never want to leave the house unite! Separately at our own homes.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has bookmarked:

I’m sorry I said “Awooga” when you took off your clothes. Do you still want to have sexy time?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2305 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,467

Funny Quotes Topics

15,179

Funny Quotes Images

12,467

5 minutes ago

3,430

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on Discord:

To anybody I hurt this year, I just wanna say you deserve it. Stop playing with me.

Just landed via TikTok:

I ran out of toilet paper so I had to start using old newspapers. The Times are rough.

Shared recently on YouTube:

You lose some, you lose some more.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Limbo is the only sport where being really bad at it means you’re raising the bar.

Breaking via Discord:

When people say something is cray-cray it makes me wanna vom-vom.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I live in my own little world. But it’s ok, they know me here.

Just shared via Slack:

Mambo No. 5, but it’s in a minor key, and I’m naming women who didn’t text me back.

Shared recently on Facebook:

You gotta act cool, calm, and collected around liquid eyeliner because it can sense your fear.

Trending via Instagram:

I named my dog “5 Miles,” so I can tell people I walk 5 miles every day.

Trending via X:

Don’t give up, we must remain silly.

Can anyone recommend some good behaviors for someone who just started behaving?

6 months ago

Can anyone recommend some good behaviors for someone who just started behaving?

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, a newbie in the world of behaving! 🤔 How about starting with the classic 'Don't chew with your mouth open' or the always popular 'Don't talk with your mouth full'? 💁‍♂️ Remember, behaving isn't just about following rules, it's about making the world a better (and less cringeworthy) place! 😄"

behavior, good, good behavior, humor, just, new, new start, recommend, recommendation, someone, start

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2305 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,467

Funny Quotes Topics

15,179

Funny Quotes Images

12,467

5 minutes ago

3,455

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

I can clean the whole house if I want to, but if someone asks me to do it, suddenly I’m lazy.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has viewed:

We are all monsters searching for someone to share our lives with.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

Caveman bartender: “This one’s on the cave.”

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

Aliens are gonna be super confused when they show up threatening to overthrow our leaders and we’re all stoked and offer to help.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has shared:

Funny that the Three Wise Men brought probably the three worst presents for a newborn baby.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

No one ever talks about the 6th love language (being annoying).

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

Can’t wait to put up holiday lights so life can be equally crappy but festively so.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has downloaded:

In an alternate universe, the hard way is always learning me.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

Not having a crush is dangerous. What am I supposed to think about? What if I invent something?

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

Can everyone log off? I need some time alone right now.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Reddit:

They should invent going outside without people looking at you.

Going viral on Messenger:

Not looking for a sugar daddy, but something more of a pay pal.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Remember when you could lay in one position for hours, now you have to rotate like a rotisserie chicken every 15 minutes or a hip hurts.

Going viral on Twitch:

Pretending to be a well-adjusted, functioning adult is so exhausting.

Shared recently on X:

Bought a pair of night vision goggles so that I can easily find the fridge at night without waking my wife.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Please don’t tell me how bad your life was growing up, we had to manually roll up our car windows.

Trending via TikTok:

Date idea: you hold my hand while I call the dentist and you tell me I’m so brave.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

The magician told me to “Pick a card! Any card!” So I took his Visa.

Seen just now on Slack:

Having leftover pizza for breakfast is an actual blessing.

Making waves on WeChat:

I’m sorry for the things I said when I was running late due to circumstances completely within my control.

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