Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • “Help us improve Instagram!” Nice try, fix your own damn website.
  • Having to pee when you’re driving is problematic. Having to sneeze when you’re driving is even more problematic.
  • Last night my guardian angel came to me, covered me up, gave me a kiss on the forehead and whispered in my ear: “You’re a pain in the ass!”
  • Those who still fit in their wedding dresses years later haven’t been making enough effort eating.
  • I hate small cars that disguise themselves as free parking spaces and drop their masks as soon as you pull up in front of them.
  • The adult version of “head, shoulders, knees and toes” is “wallet, glasses, keys and phone.”