Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

Whenever I’m sad, you’re there. Whenever I have problems, you’re there. Whenever I lose control, you’re there. Let’s face it, you are bad luck.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

That awkward moment between birth and death.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

I deliberately don’t go to bed early. I don’t want to look like I could be useful for anything the next day.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

Speed dating, but it’s just me changing tables at a restaurant every few minutes trying a bite of everyone’s food.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

Oh really? We’ll see what the same six people who always agree with me think about that.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

If I found E.T., I would’ve developed his jump shot.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

Doctor advised me to stop drinking. This is going to be a big change for me. I was with that doctor for decades.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

I find myself thinking “God, I need a cigarette” way too often for someone who doesn’t actually smoke.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

Food is like sex: When you abstain, even the worst stuff begins to look good.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

I’ve started ripping my shirt in half like Hulk Hogan when I mean business. Long story short, I’m looking for a new job.