Funny quotes away

77 Funny away quotes

If you ever need me, I’m always just a couple missed calls and text messages away.

2 weeks ago

I am never hungrier than when I leave the dentist and told I can’t eat right away.

1 month ago

It’s time I admit something: Sometimes, when I say good night, I don’t actually go to bed right away.

1 month ago

I wish it were social acceptable to say “I don’t care” and walk away mid conversation when you’re bored.

2 months ago

An apple a day may keep the doctor away, but some silly a day keeps the boredom at bay.

2 months ago

Imagine if spiders giggled when they ran away from us.

3 months ago

Receipts are like: Take this tiny piece of paper home with you and throw it away.

3 months ago

Putting away the Christmas tree. Sad day for cats.

3 months ago

I wonder if Mary and Joseph hated putting away the Christmas stuff as much as I do.

3 months ago

But if i put my laundry away, the laundry chair will be out of a job.

3 months ago

Being an adult means your pain never goes away, it just migrates to a new location in your body.

3 months ago

A garlic a day keeps people away.

3 months ago

I either text back right away or never, because I saw your text, replied in my head but forgot to actually type it.

3 months ago

“It’s the most wonderful crime of the year!” I crooned running away with the pot of Santa’s donations.

3 months ago

All pants are tear away pants if you’re strong enough.

3 months ago

For financial reasons, I will be passing away.

3 months ago

I kind of miss when people stood 6 feet away.

3 months ago

A big part of my job as a parent is moving things away from the edges of countertops.

3 months ago

I wonder if people that fall asleep right away know that we hate them.

3 months ago

I can feel your energy from two planets away.

3 months ago