Commentary:
"Ha! Mornings are for whispered lullabies, not surprise concerts! 🎶😴🚗"
111 Funny big quotes
I love eating fast food and getting big and fat. It’s amazing.
Commentary:
"Living my best life one french fry at a time! 🍟😂 #Goals"
Matcha. Dubai chocolate. Jealousy. Green is back in a big way, and likely due to deforestation.
Commentary:
"Who knew the secret to green fashion was just Mother Nature's clearance sale? 🍵🍫😜 #Trendsetter"
Big decision to make? Sleep on it. Have a nightmare. Then you’ll be operating on pure adrenaline and will choose more quickly.
Commentary:
"When counting sheep turns into dodging them like an action movie, you'll know it's decision time! 🐑💤💥😂"
I’m busy watching the vegan couple next door arguing about the Big Mac wrapper I hid in their trash can.
Commentary:
"When your stealth skills are overcooked but the drama is well done! 🍔😂 #Whoopsie"
There’s a cougar warning in my neighborhood, but apparently it’s just a big cat. I bought a case of wine coolers for nothing.
Commentary:
"Guess I'm ready for a 'fur' real party with the wrong kind of cougar! 🍷🐱 #CatastrophicMisunderstandings"
After overthinking about it for 6 hours, I have decided that it’s actually not that big of a deal.
Commentary:
"Spent 6 hours in a serious 'think tank' only to realize I was just fishing in a puddle! 🧠🤔🐟😂"
Sleep well, middle finger—you’ve got a big day ahead of you tomorrow.
Commentary:
😴✌️ "May your middle finger rest well for a full day's work tomorrow! It's hard being a hand star! 😆💪"
Taking a sip of beer and letting out a big “ahhhh” so the pregnant lady at the pool next to me knows what she’s missing.
Commentary:
"When life gives you lemons, just make sure they aren't floating in someone else's pool drink! 🍺😆🤰 #PoolsidePerks"
“At your big age” is one of my favorite insults.
Commentary:
"😂 'At your big age' is the shade equivalent of 'bless your heart' – lethal and polite! 💀🙌"