An apple a day may keep the doctor away, but some silly a day keeps the boredom at bay.

An apple a day may keep the doctor away, but some silly a day keeps the boredom at bay.

Commentary:
"Who needs apples when you've got silliness to ward off the doctor and boredom alike? 🍎🤪 Keep the giggles coming to stay in tip-top shape! 😄 #SillyIsTheNewHealthy"

Washing your face and water going down your elbow is so sickening.

Washing your face and water going down your elbow is so sickening.

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic 'elbow waterfall' maneuver in every face washing routine – a truly exhilarating experience for all, except maybe your elbow! 🚿💦😄"

Closing down one work tab every day until Christmas like a reverse advent calendar.

Closing down one work tab every day until Christmas like a reverse advent calendar.

Commentary:
"Ah, the modern-day struggle of counting down to Christmas not with sweet treats, but with closed work tabs! 🎄💻 Who knew our digital lives could serve as a quirky advent calendar alternative? Just make sure not to accidentally close the wrong tab and lose all that hard-earned progress! 😅 #TechSavvyCelebrations"

The best thing about work is the coffee machine and the drive home.

The best thing about work is the coffee machine and the drive home.

Commentary:
"Who needs job satisfaction when you have a reliable coffee machine and a scenic drive to look forward to? ☕️🚗 Remember, caffeine and road rage make the perfect recipe for workday survival! 😂"

Old people like to golf every day because they are so sick of everyone’s shit and just wanna repeatedly whack something.

Old people like to golf every day because they are so sick of everyone’s shit and just wanna repeatedly whack something.

Commentary:
"Who knew that golf could be the ultimate stress reliever for the older crowd? 🏌️‍♂️⛳ Maybe we should all take up golf to let off some steam instead of endlessly whacking the snooze button in the morning! 😂"

“You should exercise for at least 30 minutes every day”. Okay, and how much if you’re not trying to go to the Olympics?

“You should exercise for at least 30 minutes every day”. Okay, and how much if you’re not trying to go to the Olympics?

Commentary:
Ah, the age-old question of exercise expectations! 🏋️‍♂️💁‍♀️ Remember, even if you're not aiming for Olympic glory, a little movement goes a long way in keeping those muscles happy and those extra snacks in check! 😄🍕 #CouchPotatoGoldMedal

The 5 seconds in the morning, when I don't yet know who I am, is the best time of the day.

The 5 seconds in the morning, when I don’t yet know who I am, is the best time of the day.

Commentary:
"Ah, the blissful 5 seconds of morning amnesia – when you can pretend to be anyone you want before reality hits 🌅😂 Embrace the mystery and make the most of those fleeting moments of identity crisis!"

A garlic a day keeps the doctor away.

A garlic a day keeps the doctor away.

Commentary:
"Who needs an apple when you can have a garlic? 😂 Just make sure to keep the vampires at bay too! 🧛‍♂️ #ForgetTheAppleADay"

At bedtime, I ceremonially move the claw clip from my hair to the bag of chips, signifying the end of the day.

At bedtime, I ceremonially move the claw clip from my hair to the bag of chips, signifying the end of the day.

Commentary:
"Ah, the sacred transition from hair accessory to snack guardian! 🌙🦀 Because who needs beauty sleep when you can have crispy chips instead? 😂 #Priorities"

The best thing about living with my parents is being woken up four minutes before my alarm to be told my alarm is about to go off.

The best thing about living with my parents is being woken up four minutes before my alarm to be told my alarm is about to go off.

Commentary:
Living with parents: saving you from the inconvenience of being startled by an alarm clock since forever. It's like having your own personal alarm clock that comes with a pre-announcement service!