78 funny dream quotes

You ever wake up from your dreams impressed? Like, damn, that narrative structure was phenomenal.

2 weeks ago2 weeks ago

Ever since I was a kid, I always knew I wanted to live in a galaxy far, far away.

4 weeks ago4 weeks ago

Scientists just confirmed that our dreams were real in another reality.

1 month ago1 month ago

Source? Divine intuition, gut instinct, and cryptic symbolism from my dreams.

1 month ago1 month ago

In your 20s, there will be an evil narcissist demon disguised as the man of your dreams. It’s important that you run from that loser before he steals your light.

2 months ago2 months ago

Getting older is so fun. Your life goals slowly transition from things like ‘land a dream job’ to ‘successfully grow a cherry tomato.’

2 months ago2 months ago

Writing cover letters feels soooo “Ever since I was a little boy, I knew I wanted to be an administrative assistant when I grew up.”

2 months ago2 months ago

Pouring rain, football on TV, empty house; the stuff dreams are made of.

2 months ago2 months ago

Someone you haven’t talked to in forever will show up in your dream just to do a backflip.

2 months ago2 months ago

I invoiced my boss two extra hours for the dream I had about work last night. I’m considering that overtime.

2 months ago

Don’t give up on your dreams. If cauliflower can be pizza and zucchini can be noodles, you too can be anything you want.

2 months ago

I want to be in Metallica, and they will not let me.

2 months ago

I finally figured out my lifelong dream of becoming a human blanket, but my friends still call it napping on their couch.

2 months ago

No more fun facts. I want to know what your last nightmare was about.

2 months ago

People who say “teamwork makes the dream work” are the reason that some people want to punch other people in the face.

2 months ago

Cigarettes are a better networking tool than LinkedIn could ever dream of being.

2 months ago

I wish that reading books in the park were my job, and I got paid six figures for it.

2 months ago

My dream is being pitted against the world’s greatest AI in a writing contest and crafting a story that’s so beautiful that I make the computer cry.

2 months ago

So glad that the dream I had of you isn’t affecting me at all, and I’m able to go on with my day without thinking of it.

2 months ago

No longer chasing dreams. If they want me, they know where I nap.

2 months ago

That awkward moment when everything is going so perfectly… and then you wake up.

2 months ago

Choosing to ignore my strangely symbolic dream because I have a lot going on right now already.

2 months ago

As an academic, I sometimes dream about writing fiction instead, and then I remember grant proposals.

2 months ago

Do other people remember toasters with wings flying across our computer screens or was that a fever dream I just had?

2 months ago

Wake me up when I’m rich!

2 months ago

You are never too old to achieve your dreams. Prince Charles had to wait 73 years.

2 months ago

I want the dreams to chase me for once.

2 months ago

I think something’s missing in my life… Like… 2-3 million dollars.

2 months ago

Adults are always asking children what they want to be when they grow up because they’re looking for ideas.

2 months ago

I’m not your dream woman. I am the sudden shouting of ravens that you hear when you enter a part of the forest you shouldn’t have.

2 months ago

The females who don’t go through phones will definitely find out through dreams.

2 months ago

Getting paid to sleep would be such a dream job.

2 months ago

What’s the point of having sex dreams if you always wake up just when it’s getting down to business?

2 months ago

The new American dream is an alien invasion.

2 months ago

I love to sleep, I wish I could get paid to sleep.

2 months ago

Whoever said “team work makes the dream work” needs to explain that to my many personalities.

2 months ago

My dream DUI is driving a Saab through the Great British Bake Off tent.

2 months ago

When they have a dream sequence in a movie, how do they film the person’s dream?

2 months ago

My dream car is a taco truck.

2 months ago

Reoccurring dreams be like: ‘I dunno, here’s a rerun’

2 months ago