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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

Toast doesn’t talk. How do you know it’s French?

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

Gosh, being a princess is exhausting.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has copied:

A dating app for people who are shy called Mumble.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

Oh, you’re in a situationship? Are you the one with commitment issues or the one with low self-worth?

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I’ll pause a YouTube video to scroll on reels. I’m not sure if I’ll ever be able to be loved genuinely.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

Girls take a picture of their legs in a bubble bath and say “guess where I am”. The library?

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

I hate it when my body decides to get sick. I gave you a vegetable last week, how dare you.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

Normalize saying, “I’m not informed enough to have an opinion on the matter.”

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

Don’t tell me that everything was better in the past. I was there.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

You have never experienced true fear until a poster falls off the wall in the middle of the night.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,523

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Telegram:

I’m at the age where I have to warm up first before jumping to conclusions.

Freshly posted on Discord:

How does spaghetti know that I’m wearing light-colored clothes?

Just landed via Threads:

Dude, we’re gonna be treating others how we want to be treated later if you wanna pull up.

Trending via Threads:

The only way to forget the mistakes you made in the past is to make even bigger and graver mistakes in the present.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I’ve never seen a McDonald’s or a Burger King under construction. They just show up.

Making waves on Telegram:

Walking that line between “The internet is great” and “The internet is a mistake” daily.

Trending via Telegram:

I love my bed so much, what a place.

Going bananas on Slack:

Relationship status: I love my bed.

Trending via Facebook:

Netflix had enough cash to buy Warner Bros., but cried poor when we shared passwords with our mom.

Just shared via Slack:

I’m never really sure what to do with my hands when I go jogging, so I don’t go jogging.

Funny employer quotes

Funny employer quotes bring a burst of laughter to the workplace 🌟🤣 Whether you’re an employee or the boss, these witty words capture the quirks of office life and leadership vibes 👔💼 Ready to smile through those Monday blues and meeting marathons? Let’s dive into some hilarious takes that prove work doesn’t always have to be serious! 😂💬 #WorkHumor #BossLife

New funny employer quotes 👇

All funny employer quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

40 shares on X this month:

I’m officially at the age where I’m not upgrading my phone until it stops working.

72 shares on Reddit this month:

There’s something fundamentally wrong with the way people interact with each other on LinkedIn.

55 shares on Snapchat this month:

This football season, we need to bring back getting drunk and calling in to your team’s local radio show after the game. Such a lost art.

48 shares on Discord this month:

Sorry, I can’t today, I have to rot in bed and squander my potential.

42 shares on Slack this month:

I’m so hungry, I could eat a full-time job with health insurance.

96 shares on Telegram this month:

This flight is so long, I don’t know where I’m going anymore. I just live here now. Even the crying baby gave up.

16 shares on X this month:

Stopping a complete stranger on the street and saying, “Let’s end this little charade.”

92 shares on Threads this month:

Why do men always think “looking for fun” means sex? Wat if I want us to draw?

10 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Right now somebody’s therapist is hearing about YOU.

92 shares on Discord this month:

Sunday is proof that time travel exists, because it was just Friday.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Walking into someone’s house with healthy, thriving houseplants everywhere: “Oh, I see you dabble in witchcraft!”

24 folks are currently checking 👀

When someone asks me if my twins are natural, I tell them no they’re robots.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

She was rare. Like a meth head with good teeth.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

A baby cow is called a calf because it’s half a cow. Half cow. Calf. No further questions.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Started the year single. Ending the year single. Consistency is key.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Your first non-broke girlfriend will change your whole perspective about relationships.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Be the reason someone burns sage.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Google AI is awesome because it kills the planet and doesn’t work.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Welcome to your 40s, you’re too old to sit on the floor and put furniture together.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve already broken all my resolutions and like four commandments.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,558

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

Nothing makes me more stabby than when my husband ignores me and starts talking to the dog.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

Stop telling people to grow up. Have you seen adults?

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

I wish my life could have a stats screen but for things I care about. Like how many English Muffins with peanut butter I’ve eaten.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

If there are parallel realities, I really hope they’re not as stupid as this one.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

I like my money where I can see it: hanging in my closet.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

Parenting is cheering on your kid’s winning softball team all weekend and then cheering on the Sunday rain for cancelling the rest of the games.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has bookmarked:

Anyone still shut off lights when leaving a room because their parents used to say, “Don’t waste electricity!”

Someone from 🇪🇪 has downloaded:

I switched from coffee to orange juice and told my doctor I felt better. He said it’s the vitamin C and natural sugars, but I think it’s the vodka.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

How do I tell Instagram I don’t want to see guys almost eaten by gators?

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

I really thought adulthood would be 50% freedom and 50% fun. Turns out it’s 100% bills.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Twitch:

Sometimes life is like a cowshed. You step from one turd into the next.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I’ve decided that I need to eat more vegetables, so I’m gonna make a carrot cake later.

Going bananas on Threads:

Giant-sized bag of candy: I’m resealable. Me: That won’t be necessary.

Just shared via YouTube:

Don’t let anyone ruin your day. Be a man. Ruin it yourself.

Spotted on Slack:

I met a microbiologist today. He was a lot bigger than I expected.

Just shared via WeChat:

In a room full of art, I’d still stare at you.

Breaking via Slack:

Twitter is fun. You kinda just talk to yourself and sometimes someone replies.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Crossing things off my to-do list… I didn’t do them, I just don’t want them on my list anymore.

Spotted on Discord:

Prophecy class has been cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances.

Going bananas on Messenger:

A beautiful woman should never have to send an email. Yet, such tragedies occur every day.

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