Funny fate quotes

• I wonder if my guardian angel and my future husband’s guardian angel are in a group chat trying to coordinate.

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  1 month ago

  angel, chat, coordination, fate, future, future husband, group, group chat, guardian, guardian angel, humor, husband, i, love, relationship, trying, wonder

• “Lmao” has survived and even thrived over the years, but its cousin “rofl” has faded into indignity. The cruelty of fate.

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  1 month ago

  cousin, cruelty, even, evolution, fate, humor, internet, internet slang, language, lmao, over, rofl, slang, survival

• I’m blunt because the universe rolled me that way.

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  1 month ago

  blunt, fate, honesty, humor, me, personality, self-awareness, universe

• God’s plan for me is super weird so far.

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  1 month ago

  fate, God, gods, humor, life, me, plan, super, weird

• No matter how early you get up, fate always gets up half an hour earlier.

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  1 month ago

  always, earlier, early, fate, half, hour, humor, irony, matter, morning, time

• When we’re old, the children will use Covid to explain our brain damaged opinions much like we do to Boomers with lead. It is fate.

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  1 month ago

  age, Boomers, brain, brain damage, children, Covid, damage, damaged, explain, fate, lead, much, old, old age, opinions

• Normalize saying, “Just as the oracle foretold,” when things go your way.

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  2 months ago

  fate, humor, just, normalize, oracle, prediction, saying, superstition, things

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